


Breaking the Ice

by RoboticSpaceCase



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alpha Victor Nikiforov, Alpha Yuri Plisetsky, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Beta Otabek Altin, Comfort, Consensual sex later, Dark stuff that bleeds into fluff, Graphic Description of Rape in flashbacks, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Katsuki Yuuri, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Abortion, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape Recovery, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:16:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 27,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22888303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoboticSpaceCase/pseuds/RoboticSpaceCase
Summary: When Yuuri moves away from home a year after a traumatizing event, he does everything he can to hide his secondary gender and focus on his hobby, ice skating, and start a fresh, new life. Unfortunately, for him, alphas seem to dominate the ice and leave him wondering if he can handle it all.
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Otabek Altin/Yuri Plisetsky
Comments: 244
Kudos: 358





	1. Fake It

**Author's Note:**

> Oops here this finally is on my main account :p This will only update about once a month unless there's like, a ton of interest so sorry about that ;w;
> 
> Follow me on social media (links in my profile) if you want updates on junk :p
> 
> Anyway, this fic does focus on some heavier themes and opens with a dark flashback so please tread carefully and read the tags! Take care of your mental health! <3
> 
> With that out of the way, enjoy!~

Yuuri couldn’t breathe. If there was one thing he would have asked for in that moment, it would have been the freedom of his burning lungs. The omega in him had even stopped wanting the attention the alphas were forcing upon him, their loud, demanding growls echoing in his ears as a threat to his life rather than a show of power like they had been at the start.

His jaw had become numb from having one alpha after another hit or use him. From the waist down all he could feel was a sharp burning sensation that felt like it would never stop.

Every time he pictured those men—the way they touched him, the way they so roughly handled him—it was almost like he was looking at it through someone else’s eyes like his own brain didn’t want to believe that it had happened to him. But god could he still feel the pain and terror.

At times, he wondered if being an omega was somehow his fault. It wasn’t as if people were able to choose their secondary genders, but his uneasy mind just wanted  _ something _ to blame.  _ Anything. _ Even himself. In the end, it was always his fault for not protecting himself somehow. For not fighting his heat hard enough, for not biting, clawing, punching his way out.

They were apparently trying to breed him. That much was obvious from the lack of condoms or birth control of any kind. He would have carried one of their pups had he not been seen by a doctor afterward to get it taken care of.

An omega having an abortion was unheard of; illegal, actually. In Yuuri’s case, however, he was allowed the procedure. Having one could permanently damage their womb and make them infertile, which was something that Yuuri was okay with.

He never wanted to lay with an alpha again, let alone bear one of their children.

Their claws had left scars on his arms and legs where they had held him down. Yuuri remembered the pools of blood and other bodily fluids he had to lie in while he waited for his body to heal just enough to move again.

He lost track of many things while his body was being used. How many alphas had he been within just that one day? Was it just a day, or had he lost consciousness and became unaware of time going by? How long had it taken for someone to actually come and rescue him?

The police had said something about it lasting his entire heat but to him, everything was just a blurred together mess of tears, blood, and growls. He supposed they were probably right. His heat only lasted about three days, and that’s what had started the whole mess.

One whiff of an omega about to go into heat and apparently alphas were unable to stop themselves from grabbing them and dragging them off to an empty building to have their way with them.

To assume  _ all _ alphas were that way was unfair; Yuuri knew they could be kind. He personally knew a few, of course. Everyone did. But the chance of even just one of them being rotten kept him on edge around all of them.

A gentle  _ ping _ sound caused Yuuri to gasp, and he realized that his elevator had come to a stop. He was alone in the small space, something that he was thankful for. It felt safe.

Stepping out, Yuuri exhaled and pushed all of his jumbled up thoughts out with the puff of air. All of that was a year behind him now. He was in Chicago, not Japan. He smelled and walked like an alpha, not an omega. A new life was ahead of him, his old life far behind.

The heady scent of alpha lingered in the hall of the apartment building. It was something he had taught himself to ignore, for the most part. He had to if he were going to live his new life acting like an alpha. His inner omega would occasionally whine when he got too close to one, but his overall fear of them would put it in its place, fuzzy flashbacks forcing him to distance himself from them almost immediately.

Yuuri’s new apartment could be photographed and stuck in the dictionary under the word cramped. The simple brown door lead right into the front room, already furnished with a single couch, end table, and a TV mounted to the wall thanks to the movers his mother had hired for him. She had been so supportive of his move, encouraging him to do whatever he needed to so that he could get past what happened.

To his left was his “new” kitchen. The age of the place age showed in both rooms which had a lot of the same brown color, faded slightly from years of use. Fake tile covered the kitchen floor and it had yellowed, making the fridge and microwave stand out, them being much newer and untouched.

He was carrying only one bag, his last bag, and when he closed the door and set it down, he fell to his knees and forced in a deep breath. A wave of relief washed over him. So far away were his old problems. He could start all over here as an alpha. Fake it until you make it, they say. That’s what he now had the chance to do.

Collecting himself and the bag, Yuuri stood once more and proudly made his way to his bedroom down the short hall. He passed the bathroom on his way, the place the contents of the bag belonged in, but he would worry about that later. The fresh, never used mattress was calling to him and it was already late.

Though, he did need to do one thing with the bag.

Yuuri placed it on his bed and pulled the zipper as if it were cutting the wires on a bomb. Inside this bag, the blue, large duffle bag, his scent markers were hidden. Everything that made him come off as an alpha was in it, and he needed to put up scent blockers on the windows and doors.

The small devices were designed to basically suck up the omega scent and spew out an alpha musk, making his apartment give off the illusion that an alpha was living there. They were expensive and usually only allowed to be sold to betas and alphas, but Yuuri always managed to play off being an alpha well enough that no one asked.

Yuuri would simply claim that he had a beta at home that felt better when the entire house smelled of an alpha and they would hand it over. He had money saved from his old job at a convenience store back home and his parents had sent him off with some, so buying what he needed wasn’t an issue. A job would still need to be found within the month, but he could squeak by until he got comfortable.

Setting up the scent blockers took him half an hour and climbing around the apartment further exhausted Yuuri. By the time he was done, he was ready to pass out and wasted no time getting undressed and slipping under his covers.

As an omega, small spaces comforted him immensely. This place—with the scent blockers and deadbolt—would be perfect to nest in and have his heats. He wasn’t due to have one for another month, which would be just the right amount of time for him to adjust.

Though he had been allowed the abortion, Yuuri wasn’t able to get on any birth control to regulate his heats. He just had to plan around them and pretend that they were an alpha’s rut; aggressive and possessive. This bought him the time to lock himself away and ride out his heat until the gross, sweaty process was over with.

Until that time came Yuuri was going to get himself familiar with the area and see just how many alphas he would have to put up with throughout his days there. The nerves that were already tying knots in his stomach made him gulp and curl up under his blanket.

They were just alphas, he’s dealt with plenty of normal ones before. They wouldn’t see or smell through his guise. He would be able to go to the ice rink in the morning to clear his head, and he would be able to totally avoid any of the alphas that he knew would be there.

Yuuri would just need to be confident and force whatever bad memories that bubbled up back down.

“Fake it until you make it. Fake it until you make it.” He chanted this to himself until he fell asleep. He could fake it and he would make it. So long as he kept his nose clean and held high, Yuuri would be fine.


	2. Bravery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter two! ^-^ Be sure to check out my other social media, links it profile <3
> 
> Enjoy!~

Yuuri’s bed felt so safe and warm, he never wanted to leave. Being wrapped up in his blanket all day sounded heavenly, although it wasn’t smothered in a scent he was used to—something he would need to fix before his heat.

Yuuri  _ did _ have plans to go to the skating rink, though, so staying in bed all day would have to wait until he was done getting used to the new area.

He rolled onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. There would be alphas at the rink. Probably more than Yuuri wanted to deal with. What if one tried to talk to him? What if he was left alone with one? Would he be able to use the locker room without one of them smelling him? Sure, he had his deodorant and had washed his skating clothes in his special detergent, but what if he perspired too much and his scent bled through? Yuuri  _ was _ within a month of his next heat, would it show?

Taking a deep breath, Yuuri tried to ground himself. He had started to shake and his hands gripped at his blanket so tightly that they began to ache and his knuckles had gone paperwhite.

The deodorant would be enough, it hadn’t failed him yet. He could change at home and skip the locker room entirely. If he felt uncomfortable at any time, he could leave. There would be employees and the rink was a public place. Yuuri would be safe.

Focusing on his breath that time, Yuuri inhaled deeply and let the air filling his lungs ground him. His iron grip on his bedding lessened and the tears that had pooled in the corners of his eyes no longer threatened to fall.

Talking himself out of a panic had always been a rare occasion, and Yuuri let himself be proud of this moment.

“See?” he told himself. “I can do this. I can do this. I  _ can _ do this. I-I-” He stopped himself and swallowed thickly. If he thought about it any more the panic would consume him again, he had to just pull himself out of bed and go.

Invisible chains only allowed Yuuri to roll back on his side. He growled at himself and used every ounce of willpower to push off of his bed, nearly falling to the floor. Righting himself, Yuuri held his head and focused again on keeping his breathing steady.

Whenever he forced himself to do something that his body didn’t want to do, he would get lightheaded and need to take some time to breathe. Going to the rink would be good. He hadn’t skated in a long time and he knew it would help. He had to do this. For himself.

Filled with a new determination, Yuuri got dressed. Since he would be skipping the locker room, he didn’t bother to pack new clothes, instead making sure that he was thoroughly doused in his alpha cologne. The stronger his fake scent came off, the less likely it was for an actual alpha to approach him with any advances. He only hoped that none of them had unmated betas around since they might take his strong smell as a challenge.

Yuuri made himself a quick brunch that consisted of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and some milk. It was a light meal, but he would treat himself to a nice, full dinner when he was done skating.

Since he didn’t know the area well enough, Yuuri had to use his phone to navigate himself to the nearest rink. He walked, seeing as it was only a mile or so, following his GPS app.

The fresh air felt nice, but it was a little hot out. His jacket swayed on his hips, tied tightly around them so that he didn’t have to endure the heat of it until he was on the ice where he would actually need it. He was tempted to hold it with his skates instead, afraid that he would already be too sweaty.

“This doesn’t look right…” Yuuri looked down at his phone and back up at the large building.

It looked new, fresh blue and gray paint anywhere that the large windows didn’t cover. The lobby inside was empty of people, which allowed him to see the beautiful, designer decor. Everything about it screamed modern, big, and expensive.  _ Not _ old and small like the one he had  _ wanted  _ to go to.

Yuuri sighed and slumped his shoulders. His phone had taken him to the wrong rink. This one must’ve been a newer one that he hadn’t heard about. Walking to the other one—if it even still existed—in the heat would make him sweat more and by then he would be too nervous to go in.

Judging by the staff inside, Yuuri could tell that it was open, and he seriously debated going in. He really wanted to skate. If he didn’t go in here, he wouldn’t be able to skate at all.

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other and gulped. What kind of alphas would be in a place like this? Probably very aggressive, competitive ones. The kind that Yuuri especially wanted to avoid.

“Are you alright, sir?”

A young woman’s voice made Yuuri jump back and yelp, falling ungracefully onto his rear. When his initial scare faded, he looked at her and sniffed the air, calming even further when he found that she was simply a beta.

“F-fine, I’m sorry.” He hurriedly stood, brushing his pants off. “Is this rink open?”

The woman laughed then gave an exaggerated shrug. “It is if you don’t mind sharing the ice with the pros. I was going to skate today too since it’s dead, but I don’t like being watched so intently.”

Everything about this woman relaxed Yuuri. She reminded him a lot of Yuko, a friend that he had an emotional parting with when he left Japan. Her presence made him smile.

“I don’t mind sharing the ice.” He did, but this rink looked big enough for him to keep to whatever side the others weren’t using.

She smiled back at him, her pearly white teeth catching the sunlight. “Well, alright. Have fun!” A polite wave and she was gone, leaving Yuuri to stare back at the building.

“I can do this,” he said to himself. Clenching his fists, Yuuri straightened his back and held himself like an alpha. If he acted confidant, they would leave him be.

His chest clenched when he walked into the building and he nearly whimpered. The air was  _ drenched _ in alpha scent, the oil sticks on the front desk not hiding a bit of the smell coming from the rink.

After what had happened, Yuuri’s body always had two separate reactions to alphas. The omega in him—especially now that his heat was coming up—wanted nothing more than to put his body on display in hopes of sharing the heat with an alpha. All of those feeling would be shot down quickly, however, when his more rational side would remember the clouded musk that suffocated him while alphas had their way with his body.

A violent shiver ran up his spine and Yuuri had to shake those thoughts from his head. He wasn’t about to let some sweaty alphas ruin his skating time.

“I would like a day pass,” he stated sternly. “Please,” he added softly.

The annoyed man sitting behind the desk glanced up at Yuuri from under his thick eyelashes. Though his eyes bored into him, Yuuri didn’t feel very threatened since this man had a strong beta scent. He was thankful that they were all he seemed to be running into.

Lazily, the man tapped on his computer screen, pressing a button to ring up the pass. “Ten bucks, reader’s on the counter.”

Yuuri nodded and fumbled for his wallet, pulling free his new, American card.

“Doors are open, it’s free skate. No outside food or drink, blah, blah.” He sniffed the air and sneered. “And don’t be starting any fights.”

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Yuuri chuckled awkwardly.

The man handed him the printed pass then returned to looking at his phone, no longer caring for the conversation.

With the pass, Yuuri started to drag his feet to the doors that lead into the rink. He could hear chatter, soft music, and blades scraping against the ice. Yuuri had been around strange alphas in the past year. He knew how to handle them, his nerves were just getting the best of him.

Yuuri knew he could do this.

The rink was immaculate. Clean, highly cushioned seats wrapped around the massive skating area and a crisp air chilled Yuuri as soon as he was fully inside. There were benches on the sides, ones that looked like they could be roped off during an event.

“You need more speed,” a voice chirped out over the sound of music.

A young, blond man was currently lying on the ice, scowling at the man who had spoken. He scoffed and picked himself up, already getting back into his routine.

The man standing on the side glanced over at Yuuri then back to the ice, pausing for a moment before he did a double-take. His short, silver hair, intense stare, sharp features, and tall posture made Yuuri feel a little weak in the knees. He was one attractive man.

But he was also an alpha. One that was staring at Yuuri and smiling, no longer paying attention to the blond that furiously skated to the upbeat classical music playing from the speaker resting on a small table.

Yuuri gulped and looked away from the man. He could do this. The silver-haired man likely just wanted to let Yuuri know that he had noticed him, not anything heinous.

The blond fell again and shouted, pounding his fist on the ice. “I know I can do these stupid jumps!”

“Calm down, Yuri, I know you can too. You just have to focus.” Both men had thick Russian accents, their words almost lost on Yuuri.

He spoke English fluently, but some accents were a little harder for him to understand. Russian, apparently, was one of them. Not so badly that it was impossible to work with, but enough that he may have to ask for them to repeat themselves on occasion.

Yuuri perked up at the mention of his name—that much he understood—but cocked his head to the side when he realized that he wasn’t the one being addressed.

“Are you going into rut soon, is that it? You know I allow for time off when-”

“No!” the other Yuri shouted. “And I’d like it if you didn’t mention that crap when there are other people around.”

The attractive alpha waved his hand at the blond, his eyes still on Yuuri. “We’re all alphas here, there’s no issue. I’m sure this stranger doesn’t mind. Do you?”

Yuri followed the man’s gaze and gave Yuuri a death glare. Having an alpha be that aggressive right off the bat, even one younger and smaller than him, made Yuuri shiver and he had to force himself not to cower.

“Come skate with us, don’t be shy!” The alpha on the side calmly walked over to Yuuri, his long legs carrying him over quickly. He reached out to put an arm around Yuuri, but the smaller man flinched back and nearly let a hiss slip out.

He suddenly became keenly aware of how rapidly his heart was pounding in his chest. The alpha wasn’t approaching him with hostile intent, but he was brash, and that scared Yuuri.

The man looked bewildered at first and took a step back, a look of understanding filling his features. “I’m sorry, where are my manners! I am Viktor Nikiforov,” he said with an extravagant bow. “I’m here to coach that angry little brat sitting on the ice.” He laughed when Yuri started to shout at him. “We don’t mind you sharing the ice with us! In fact, I’d love to see you skate! Do you do it often?”

Yuuri had to level his thoughts before he spoke. This alpha was very open and apparently unashamed of most things. He felt overwhelmed by his surprisingly sweet but strong scent mixed with his in-your-face attitude.

“Ah, well, uh,” Yuuri stammered while fidgeting with his jacket, which still hung on his hips. Putting it on soon would make him feel better, as well as actually getting on the ice. “Sometimes,” was all he could manage to say.

Victor excitedly clasped his hands together then gestured to the ice. “Well, get your skates on, let’s skate!” The alpha skipped away to a bench that had two bags on it, digging in one until he pulled out some very expensive looking skates, definitely professional grade.

Yuuri looked down at his own skates, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious that his were an old pair that he had had for years. He put them on anyway, hesitating slightly. Was he really about to join a couple of alphas on the ice? One acted very aggressively and the other had a very energetic personality that Yuuri wasn’t sure he could keep up with.

Once he had his skates and jacket on, the ice suddenly had a heavy impending doom feeling to it. Once Yuuri stepped on, he would be stuck for at least an hour. If he left earlier than that the alphas might wonder why he was so afraid of them. Of course, it wasn’t like he could leave right then anyway. He already had his skates on, there was no turning back.

He wondered very briefly if putting his headphones on would be rude but soon decided that he would put one of the buds in regardless. His music would help ease the rapidly fraying nerves.

“I don’t believe I caught your name!” Viktor shouted at him from the other side of the rink.

Getting in on the further side had been on purpose, but it didn’t seem like it had deterred Viktor in the least bit.

“My name is also Yuuri,” he said almost too quietly.

Viktor effortlessly glided to him, his hands behind his back. The man should have been cold with just a simple, thin, gray v-neck on, however, he seemed perfectly content with the chilly air around them.

“Two Yuris,” he mused. “That might get a little confusing.” He skated around Yuuri while tapping his finger on his chin. “Perhaps we should call my pupil something else.”

“Me? Why do I have to have a nickname? Make him have one!” Yuri kept his distance, which Yuuri was glad for. The less alpha smell surrounding him, the better.

The energetic alpha looked back at Yuuri and hummed. “I’d like to see you skate first. Can you do any jumps?”

Yuuri gave a small shrug. He wanted to avoid making himself seem small and submissive, but the taller man—the  _ real _ alpha _ — _ had stopped right in front of him, much too close for personal comfort.

His scent was a natural musk mixed with some sort of cologne, one that wasn’t too strong and overbearing but still lingered in your nose. Yuuri’s omega whined at it and wanted to bury himself in the scent, but again his logical side reminded it of the last time he had been soaked in an alpha’s stink.

“I would like to see what you know,” Viktor said softly. He was staring down at Yuuri, a new, much less energetic look on his face. It was gentle and thoughtful, almost as if he were trying to read Yuuri.

“Alright,” the smaller man breathed. Backing away, Yuuri proceeded to circle the end of the rink Yuri wasn’t using, warming himself up because it had been a long time since he had skated last.

Viktor moved out of his way and ushered Yuri further back as well, giving Yuuri the entire rink to use. He wasn’t sure why the alpha wanted to see him skate so badly, but Yuuri would entertain the idea, if only because it got the alphas away from him.

The song playing from his headphones ended and as the new one began, Yuuri started to skate with it. He never once made up any kind of routine in his mind, he just went with the music and did what felt right. After many years of watching Olympic skaters and ice shows, he had a basic understanding of what he was supposed to do.

Small jumps were something he could do. Yuuri landed one, albeit sloppily, and smiled when his skates continued to glide on the ice rather than come out from under him.

Being watched so closely made him a little nervous. Yuuri remembered the woman he met outside and how she said that they would be observing him. He didn’t think she actually meant it so seriously. The alphas were watching him skate, probably comparing him to themselves, inwardly mocking him for his subpar abilities.

Attempting another small jump to impress them was, in short, a mistake. Yuuri landed it, but awkwardly and only one foot connected with the ice. The speed launched him right into the border around the rink, his shoulder hitting it with enough force to make Yuuri cry out.

Viktor was to him in seconds, the other Yuri not far behind.

“I was impressed until the wall,” the silver-haired alpha laughed. “Are you alright?” he added more seriously.

Both alphas towered over him, their presence hurting the situation more than helping.

“Fine,” Yuuri forced out. He pushed himself up and squared up to the alphas, a clear sign that he wanted them to back off. It came off more harshly than he intended, but they took it as a warning and not a challenge, thankfully.

“Really though, you did wonderful! With some work, you could be amazing!” Viktor pulled Yuri away at the warning signal from the other. “You’re welcome to come skate with us whenever you’d like. Yuri seems to be going through some sort of pre-rut rage though, so being friendly might have to wait.”

“I am not going into rut!” Yuri protested. “Otabek and I have it scheduled for weeks from now if you really must know, nosey old man.”

The blond’s aggressive tone made Yuuri stiffen and clench his fists. He had to play it cool. If he whimpered or acted submissive they would question it, and he wasn’t prepared for that.

“Ah, having a schedule is perfect! I take it you worked it around practice?” Viktor looked over at Yuuri, eyeing him from head to toe, clearly looking for any other injury. When he found none, his attention went back to Yuri.

“Duh,” he scoffed. “At least he’s a beta and not an omega. Having to plan two heats sounds like such a hassle.”

Viktor nodded slowly, his head tilting to the side. “I assume it would be. It’s likely that neither of us will ever have to worry about it, however. Omegas are so scarce these days. I’ve heard they only show up in small towns, not big cities like this.”

“I don’t have to worry about it because I’ve got Beka. I don’t see myself leaving him for some prissy omega.”

Yuuri unintentionally lowered his head. Omegas had a reputation of being spoiled brats that cried wolf the second an alpha gave them a funny look or breathed in their general direction. In reality, omegas were just scared, and only pampered when they were fertile and actively looking to bond and mate. Some omegas did fit the stereotype, sure, but out of whatever handful of them was left, Yuuri knew that an omega that didn’t seem useful was anything but prissy and spoiled.

“Yuuri?” Viktor was looking at him again, his expression gentle. “I’m sorry, have we touched a sore spot? We didn’t mean it. I have nothing against omegas. I’m sure the one you’re thinking of isn’t like they say they are.”

If anything, at least Viktor seemed genuinely nice. Yuuri knew alphas could be, he just never wanted to get close enough to talk to one and see that. This one just happened to be right in his face, as if the universe had tossed the man at him to show him that he had to stop cowering from them. This  _ was _ his new start, he should be trying to be more open to the idea of making friends, alpha or not.

“Uh, it’s my...mom. My mother is an omega,” he lied as he straightened himself again. “I’m from a small village in Japan, omegas are a little more common there.” That was a lie also. Yuuri had only ever met two other omegas his entire life and both were from out of town.

“I’m sure she’s wonderful!” Viktor opened his mouth to say more but Yuri harshly pushed him in the shoulder.

“Are we going to train more today or what? I need to get these jumps down before the next competition.” The blond crossed his arms, again narrowing his eyes at Yuuri. “We’ll have more time for your life story some other time, four eyes.” He skated off to the other side of the rink, heading for their radio to change the music.

Viktor gave Yuuri an apologetic look. “He’s just frustrated with himself, don’t take it personally. I would love it if you did come skate with us again sometime, we could talk more! Do you have plans of coming back here?”

Besides slamming into the wall and not actually getting much skating time in, Yuuri hadn’t had an awful time. These alphas weren’t so bad. He was still going to keep his guard up around them, but none of the aggression had been towards him.

“I do. I’ll probably come back tomorrow. For now, I’m going to go home and nurse my shoulder.” Yuuri forced a smile. He had to seem confident around them, but he could do it. Standing tall with a puffed chest wasn’t too hard to feign, not when the alphas around him were being calm.

“I’ll be waiting for you then! I hope your shoulder feels better before you skate though, it could be bad to overwork it.”

Yuuri nodded, rubbing the hurt shoulder. “I’ll be sure to take it easy.”

They parted ways, Victor returning to Yuri while saying something loudly in Russian that made the blond groan, and Yuuri going to the bench to take his skates off. They slipped free from his feet easily, the usual swollen ache not there to make it a painful process. He really had wished he had skated more than most of a song, but Yuuri was proud of himself regardless of how little skate time he got.

Not only had he gotten out of bed, but he walked to the rink in a new place, went  _ into _ the rink, talked to alphas, and kept his cool. For him, that was a huge win that deserved to be rewarded.

“I hope there’s a place that sells pork cutlet bowls, or at least something like it around here,” he mumbled to himself. He looked back right as Yuri started a triple lutz, landing it perfectly.

The blond silently cheered while Victor loudly encouraged him from the side. Maybe landing the jump so flawlessly would have Yuri in a better mood tomorrow, and Yuuri could try to open up to them even more. It would be a challenge, but Yuuri felt good about it. He could make friends with these alphas, and he would do it without fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri, our brave boi ;w; he deserves the world dammit
> 
> Comments are very appreciated! <3 <3 <3


	3. Going Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the new chapter! Hopefully I can get my shit together soon and try to update this more than once a month ;w; Tbh though, right now I update things based on popularity (I don't care about the numbers, I just want people to have their fave things of mine sooner) so if you like this fic, please comment! Comments let me know who's interested and engaged in the story! ^-^
> 
> Also, be sure to check out my social media (links in profile)! <3
> 
> Enjoy!~

Time passed way too fast for Yuuri. He wasn’t even able to sleep that night—thanks to both his shoulder pain and nerves—and yet the hands on the clock spun all too rapidly for him. He wanted to go back to the skating rink and actually get some skating time in but he also didn’t want to feel cornered about those alphas, nor did he want to fall again and hurt his arm even worse.

It was only swollen, nothing broken or out of place, but it still hurt and he didn’t want to push it. An ice pack sat on it while he cooked himself a nice breakfast, thinking about how hungry he had been lately.

Before heats, omegas and alphas ate more than they usually would, preparing their bodies for the days where they would eat very little. Afterward, they would tend to eat a lot as well to make up for the lack of food depending on how much they were able to eat during. Those that didn’t eat a lot around or during their heats would need longer recovery times, which most wanted to avoid as it sucked to be stuck in bed for any longer than necessary.

Yuuri wasn’t all that worried that he was already starting to crave large meals. His heat was still at least two weeks away, giving him plenty of time to prepare and avoid any scent mishaps.

Soft, classical music played from his small, Bluetooth speaker on the counter, further soothing his worries. Yuuri was fine. He had a new life, his heat was scheduled just in time for him to be ready to nest in his new home, and he had a place to skate. Yeah, there were some loud alphas there, but he could handle it. They thought he was an alpha too, so they would have no real reason to bother him more than they already did.

After he ate, Yuuri showered and scrubbed himself with his scent masking soap, determined to soak himself in the strong smells. He planned to skate for at least a solid hour and he knew that would work up a good sweat. Packing a change of clothes and extra alpha perfume would help afterward, though he would have to ask that rather in-your-face alpha if the place had a private changing room.

Thinking of the alpha unsettled Yuuri a little. Would he be able to smell Yuuri while covered in sweat if he got close? What would he do if he did? The last time it was just him and the two alphas, would he be safe if they found out? One of them had made it sound like he was mated to a beta, but that didn’t always stop alphas from being aggressive.

They didn’t  _ seem _ like bad people, though…

No, he couldn’t let himself overthink this. He would be fine. Not all alphas were like the ones that hurt him.

Outside, the air smelled clean and the weather was calm. It helped him breathe easier, relaxing his flurried thoughts. The weight of his bag didn’t even bother him like he thought it would. Knowing that the deodorant and cologne were in there to help keep him safe made it much easier to carry.

The rink stood less intimidating than it had the day before, the lobby still empty of people. He wondered why a place so nice would be so empty. Maybe he wasn’t the only one who had been intimidated by the alphas there. That girl  _ had _ said that they were pros and most people wouldn’t want to skate around people that could and would skate literal circles around them.

“Day pass?” Yuuri said softly to the man behind the counter, earning him an annoyed upwards glance.

“Same as yesterday,” he mumbled while readying the computer for payment and printing.

With his day there paid for, Yuuri summoned the courage he had found before and walked into the rink with purpose, unaware that there would be more people skating with the alphas.

“Oi, look who’s here!” Viktor raised his hand high above his head and waved at Yuuri, bringing the attention of all of the others to him.

In the group, there were three alphas and a beta, the beta hanging closely to the other Yuri. He had short black hair and stood taller than his alpha, an interesting but not necessarily rare sight.

Viktor skated over to meet Yuuri, the man’s excitement and smile growing as he approached. “I’m so glad you came back! Is your arm feeling any better?” He stepped off the ice, not coming much closer than a few feet from Yuuri.

“Yeah, it feels much better, thank you. H-how are you?” He adjusted the bag’s strap on his shoulder, his eyes stuck on the others. He hadn’t been prepared to face more alphas than he had the day before, but he knew he had to keep his brave streak going or he’d fall back into being too scared to go out at all.

“I’m doing well, thank you for asking.” The alpha gestured to the ice and his group of friends, his smile growing wider. “Come join us! We’d love the company. It gets a little stale in here with just us. People seem like they don’t want to skate when we’re here.”

Yuuri nodded, setting his bag down by a bench. “I-I gotta put my skates on first. I’ll join you as soon as I’m done.”

Viktor gave him a small wave then skated back to the others, talking loudly to them about how Yuuri was going to skate with them.

It made him feel a little better that there was at least one beta in the group and that the other alphas didn’t seem too phased by him joining. He didn’t want to back down today because he really needed to skate to relieve some stress.

Once he was ice-ready Yuuri made his way over to one of the openings. He was wearing only one earbud again and happily listened to the music to ignore the others for a little while, warming up away from them.

It was nice that they had given him some space, likely knowing that he needed it to get his bearings. Yuuri had skated a bit back at home, but compared to them he definitely needed the time to get used to being on the ice.

He didn’t do anything fancy, mostly because he didn’t know how, but it seemed to once again catch the eye of the loud-mouthed alpha.

“I like how smooth your footwork is,” Viktor said evenly as he skated in a slow circle around Yuuri.

The action didn’t feel threatening as much as it did playful. He had to keep reminding himself that Viktor saw him as a fellow alpha and not as an omega. Of course he wouldn’t be trying to corner him or scare him, alphas didn’t do that to each other unless they were fighting over something. Or someone.

“Thank you,” Yuuri said softly. “I-I used to skate a little back home. A good friend and her family were in charge of the rink, so I got to go in a lot.” He skated towards one of the walls so that the alpha couldn’t continue to circle him.

Viktor seemed to notice that Yuuri didn’t like being cornered so he backed off. It was nice that he at least caught onto hints easily. “Have you ever considered doing it professionally?”

Yuuri was unable to hide his laugh. “A pro? Me? I’m a bit too clumsy for that, I think. I like skating as more of a hobby. I d-don’t think I’d make it very far in competitions.”

“Nonsense!” the alpha chimed. “I see a lot of potential in you.” He got close to Yuuri again, a friendly smile on his face. “I could show you a few things. Help you get into doing jumps and things like that.”

“I still don’t know…” Yuuri bit his bottom lip, looking down at the ice. It had plenty of fresh marks in it, most from him since the others seemed to be talking more than skating.

Viktor’s smile softened and he gestured to his group of friends. “It’s okay, it’s not like I need an answer now. Would you think about it at least? Maybe while we’re all out for drinks? It’s rare that we find another alpha that’s relaxed around us. The others would love to meet you.”

It was unclear if Viktor could see the color drain from Yuuri’s face, but after a moment of silence the alpha backed off. He casually skated a foot or so away, his smile looking more and more discouraged.

“If you don’t want to, that’s okay. It would be a little strange going out with a group of people you’ve barely met, no?” His smile came back in full force and he elegantly turned on a dime to face the other way, looking back at Yuuri. “We’re leaving in half an hour if you change your mind.”

Yuuri was left alone on his side of the ice again to skate in circles for a while, staring after the alpha. He really should go with them. There wasn’t any real reason he should turn the offer down. He was there to start his new life, after all. Making a few friends would be good for him.

With every ounce of courage Yuuri could muster, he skated over to the group. He stayed close to Viktor, seeing as that was the one person he kind of knew. “Uh, h-hey,” he said quietly. “I actually...I’d love to go out for drinks.” He smiled and watched the reactions of the group, noticing that the others mostly looked unphased while Viktor looked ecstatic.

“Wonderful!” Viktor cheered. “I’ll introduce you to everyone!” He glided over to Yuri, the small blond looking extremely disinterested. “You know the other Yuri. Next to him is his mate, Otabek. He too is a skater, even though he’s a beta.” Viktor pointed to the person next to Yuri, the tall dark-haired beta giving him a small wave but not smiling.

Yuuri smiled and waved back but waited to say anything until Viktor introduced him to the other alpha, who was eyeing him just as cautiously as the others.

“And this is Christophe,” Viktor finished.

“It’s a pleasure. And what might your name be?” the other alpha purred, though his wary expression didn’t change. He had a different accent also, sounding German or Swedish. Yuuri wasn’t fully sure which since he wasn’t very good with accents.

“M-my name’s Yuuri, also. I’m from Japan.”

Viktor continued to smile, moving closer to Yuuri again. “We can talk a lot more once we’re at the restaurant. Are you about ready to go, Yuuri?”

“Yeah. I just need to take my skates off, really. And maybe change? Is there a changing room here?”

“Yup! Back that way,” he said, pointing to the area near the entrance. “We can wait out here for you. We’ll be ready by the time you’re done, I’m sure.”

“Okay. I’ll hurry.” He gave his best smile and headed off the ice, making his way back to the place Viktor pointed to.

The changing area was super simple compared to the rest of the rink, the plain room not giving Yuuri much to look at while he changed his clothes, using as much of his fake alpha scent as he was able to without overdoing it. He didn’t want it coming off too strongly in fear that the other alphas might take it as him being standoff-ish, especially since the other Yuri had his mate with him.

Just as Viktor said they would be, the others were all ready to leave when Yuuri came back out.

Again his anxiety fell over him and Yuuri stood frozen for a moment while his brain panicked. He was about to go off with a bunch of alphas in a place he didn’t know very well. What if something went wrong? These alphas couldn’t be trusted to help him. They seemed like nice people, but were they? Viktor seemed nice enough, and Yuri likely wouldn’t bother him while he was with his mate, but what about Christophe? What kind of alpha was he? What if he got aggressive? Weren’t they saying they were about to go out for drinks? Would alcohol make them mean? What if Viktor was just pretending to be nice-

“Yuuri? Are you alright?” Viktor stood in front of him, waving his hand in front of the smaller man’s face. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Yuuri flinched and stepped back, shaking his head. “N-no. I mean, no I haven’t seen a ghost. I’m fine.” He swallowed the lump that had grown in his throat, trying his best to shove those bad thoughts away. Everything would be fine.

Viktor gave him a strange look but brushed it off, for the time being, ushering him off with the group.

They took two taxis, Viktor telling Yuuri that he was going to pay for everything for him. Yuuri tried to decline, but the alpha was persistent and refused to let him pay for anything. He said it was a welcome gift, and at that Yuuri gave in and just accepted it.

The restaurant they went to wasn’t anything too fancy, though Yuuri wasn’t sure why he thought it would be. They were just a group of people going out for casual drinks, it wasn’t anything more than that. It was kind of crowded, though, so he enjoyed that. The more people, the less likely any alphas could try anything.

Not that Yuuri paid much attention to them, anyway. As soon as they sat down, Viktor adamant about Yuuri being next to him, Yuuri checked out. His nerves were still fried and he was a little tired from skating.

Christophe had clearly warmed up to him as they sat and ate, smiling at him and trying to stir up a conversation. “So, what brings you here, hm? You seem to like skating, but you’re definitely not a pro, so I doubt you came here for that.”

Yuuri looked down at his plate of appetizers, realizing he hadn’t touched much of it. It made him feel bad since Viktor had paid for it, so he started to pick at it a bit more. “Well, I’m just kind of...starting over here. I figured moving from Japan would give me a fresh start, so…” He trailed off and shrugged, taking in a mouthful of food so that he wouldn’t be expected to say more.

“I think that’s wonderful,” Viktor smiled. “Are you enjoying it here so far?”

“Y-yeah, it’s been peaceful.” He offered a smile as well and after that didn’t speak much.

He was still nervous and didn’t want them to notice so he kept to himself and just tried to laugh along whenever the group did. It was hard for him to connect with them, anyway. Even if he had wanted to talk with them he knew his mind wouldn’t let him. Everything that came out would be awkward and unrelated anyway, why bother?

“We’re going to order the drinks now. Would you like anything?” Viktor waved a hand in Yuuri’s direction, shaking the omega from his thoughts.

A drink might help him loosen up a bit, but he also knew himself well enough to know that too much alcohol would lead to bad things. He was an...eccentric drunk.

“I’ll have just one of whatever you’re getting, please. As long as it’s not too much.” Yuuri kept his gaze down on his plate, not caring that the others had sensed his detachment. What was he even thinking, coming here with them? Of course he wouldn’t fit in. He was an omega pretending to be an alpha, they could never really accept him into their friend group.

“I’ll be getting a mixed drink, does that sound alright?” Viktor’s friendly smile remained even though Yuuri probably looked bored.

It made the omega wonder if Viktor was after something. Why would someone be so nice when all Yuuri was doing was pushing him away? It wasn’t too uncommon for alphas to mate with other, meeker alphas, so it was possible that Viktor was just trying to sleep with him. Not that Yuuri was much to look at. Viktor was, though. Maybe Yuuri would be just another notch on his headboard to the alpha.

“It sounds fine,” Yuuri smiled back. He was trying his best to be nice but he knew that he was likely never going to be invited out with them again.

Not long after their waitress brought over their drinks, Yuuri and Viktor were handed the same blue, pineapple-smelling martinis. Yuuri couldn’t smell alcohol on it and when he took a sip it didn’t really taste like there was much in it either.

The others all got either beer or their own colorful drink. Christophe drank all of his as if they were having some sort of contest. Just watching him do it made Yuuri a little queasy. He had to drink his much slower, taking a bite of the fries or wings in front of him each time he took a sip.

By the end of their outing, he didn’t feel tipsy but something in his gut definitely didn’t like that he had had the alcohol. They paid and he stood to leave, stumbling a little bit. The ground felt like it had suddenly shifted under him and he accidentally grabbed onto Viktor’s arm to steady himself.

“S-sorry,” he mumbled as he pulled his hand away.

Viktor gave him a smile but his concern was palpable. “It’s okay. Are you alright?”

Yuuri nodded, cursing himself and his body. What was he thinking, drinking so close to his heat? Already his body was changing its diet for it, he should have known it wouldn’t want the alcohol. “I’m okay.”

“Can’t hold your alcohol?” the other Yuri laughed. “You only had one drink, that’s so lame!”

“Don’t be rude, Yuri. I’ll just take the cab home with him and make sure he gets inside okay.” Viktor made a waving gesture at them to shoo them off. “You guys go on, I’ll catch up later.”

Panicked thoughts started to fill Yuuri’s head. The alpha was going to take him home. Alone. He would know where he lived and they would be alone. Viktor really didn’t seem like a bad guy, though, so was he worrying for nothing? Having help would be nice, but what if something went wrong?

The others spoke amongst themselves while they waited for cabs, Yuuri standing next to Viktor with his fists clenched. He could lie and say that he really didn’t want another alpha in his new home for a while, but that would make him seem more aggressive than he was and the real alpha might see through it.

Both cabs pulled up at about the same time, Yuri, Otabek, and Christophe piling into one of them while Yuuri stared at the open door of his and Viktor’s, his nerves splashing around so hectically that he felt like he might puke.

“Sitting down will help,” Viktor chuckled.

“Ri-right. Yeah, it will,” Yuuri choked out. He slid into the seat and pulled his seatbelt on, thankful that Viktor made sure not to touch him.

“What’s your address?” the alpha asked softly.

Unable to think of an excuse to not give it up, Yuuri spit it out and hoped that his voice wasn’t trembling like he thought it was. He knew based on how long it took to get to the restaurant from the rink that the cab ride would be short, so he was thankful that the awkward silence wouldn’t drag on for much longer.

The rock that had settled in his gut during the drive only seemed to get worse when they pulled up to the building.

“Keep it running, I’ll be back down in a moment,” Viktor told the driver.

Hearing that made Yuuri feel a little better. The alpha wouldn’t try anything when he had someone waiting on him. He was just there to help Yuuri. He was nice. Alphas could be nice.

“Do you need help out?” Viktor offered his hand to Yuuri, but the omega didn’t take it.

Instead, he crawled out of the cab and tripped on the curb. Again he grabbed onto the alpha to keep himself from falling. That time, however, he kept hold of him and let Viktor lead him to the apartment doors.

Viktor didn’t say anything to him during their walk. He didn’t seem to mind Yuuri awkwardly holding onto his arm and didn’t mind letting the smaller man tug him in the right direction to the elevator.

In the small area, Viktor finally said something to him, though Yuuri didn’t hear it. All he could focus on was the overpowering scent Viktor gave off, his musk swallowing the air around them. It felt suffocating and yet Yuuri’s inner omega  _ loved _ it. He hadn’t been this close to an alpha in a while, especially not so close to a heat.

Viktor’s shirt was so soft, the thin material calling out to Yuuri to rub his face against it. He wanted to smell like this alpha. Roll around in a nest that had his scent all over it and enjoy feeling secure under its promise to protect him from other alphas.

Just before he let his close-to-heat brain talk him into actually rubbing his face on the alpha’s shoulder, the elevator’s doors opened to his floor and Viktor started to walk with him in tow.

“Which one is yours?” Viktor said once the doors had closed behind them.

“Oh, uhm, second on the right.” His voice cracked. Viktor  _ had _ to know what was going on, right? Yuuri had been so weird and distant, there was no way the alpha couldn’t see that he was different.

Viktor walked him to the door, stepping back so that Yuuri could open it. “I hope you feel better. Can I expect to see you at the rink again? Maybe not tomorrow, but perhaps the next day?”

Yuuri let his door swing open, taking in the familiar scent to clear his head. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly before speaking. “Y-yeah, I… This rink is a lot bigger than the one I’m used to, and you all seem nice.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, just then realizing that Viktor had been carrying his bag. “I’m sorry,” he said as he looked down. “I’m terrible company. Thank you for helping me home, I do appreciate it.”

He looked back at the alpha and tried his best to give an honest smile. Yuuri felt like he could cry right then and there though, so it probably didn’t seem like a happy smile. His stomach still churned from the small meal and alcohol, and he hated that he had to be like this. Hated that his fear had prevented him from going home by himself, carrying his own bag, thanking the alpha for paying for him.

“It’s no problem, Yuuri,” he smiled. “I can take this in for you as well if you’d like?”

“Oh, no, no!” Yuuri held his hand out to take the bag from the alpha. “You’ve- you’ve done enough, really. I-I can take it in.”

Viktor handed it to him, his cheery demeanor from earlier returning. He dug his hand into his pocket, pulling out his phone and handing it to the omega. “Put your contact information in here and I’ll send you mine when I get home. That way if you ever need anything I can help out. I do know this area pretty well now, so I won’t mind if you need a tour or something.”

The warmth in the alpha’s tone melted some of Yuuri’s stress away, making it much easier for him to focus on typing his name and number in correctly.

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” he said as he gave the alpha his phone back. “I guess I’ll...see you later?”

“Definitely! I’ll be sending you a message later, so keep an eye out for it!”

Viktor waved as he walked back to the elevator, Yuuri waiting until the alpha was on his way back down before going into his apartment to either cry or vomit. He wasn’t sure which, yet. Maybe both.

As soon as he plopped down into his bed, he buried his face into his pillow and groaned. That was  _ exhausting. _ His head was swimming and he knew that the only reason he had kept his cool in the end was that his body was ready to drag the alpha inside to drown the place with his scent.

He would have to avoid the alpha until after his heat, he decided. If Viktor caught onto Yuuri’s inner omega pining for him, things could go south. Sure, Viktor had been really nice—nicer than Yuuri thought anyone could be about the situation—but that might’ve just been because he thought Yuuri was an alpha too. Would he be rude to Yuuri if he found out he was an omega? Would he look down on him for it?

Shaking his head, Yuuri pulled himself back out of bed to change into his sleepwear. He needed to stop thinking and maybe watch a show or some videos online. Viktor wasn’t trying to hurt him. He was a nice alpha that wanted to make friends, that’s all.

Once in his comfortable clothes, Yuuri pulled his blankets and pillows into a neat bundle in which he sat right in the middle of. His laptop sat in front of him with the speakers low, playing a comedy that kept his attention. His stomach was still upset and his nerves were fried, but Yuuri had to count that day as at least a partial success.

Not only had he talked himself into going out with the group of mostly alphas, he had also kept himself from both breaking down in front of Viktor or rubbing his face on the alpha. They were little victories, but he had to hold onto those moments. They were important building blocks in his new life and the more of them he had, the easier it would be to make it.

His phone buzzed at his side and he checked it to find a message from Viktor, asking if Yuuri felt any better. He sent his reply, telling him that he just needed some rest and thanked the alpha again for helping him. It felt a little formal, but with time he really could see himself making friends with this alpha, and maybe the others as well. All he had to do was keep latching onto those moments of bravery and remind himself that not every alpha was bad. Viktor was nice, and he was sure that under his aggression, the other Yuri was too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Viktor is too sweet ;w; need me a man like him lol
> 
> Thanks for reading! <3


	4. Kindness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're finally caught up to the chapter I originally stopped updating at :p I'm updating this again because I got enough feedback to bump this story up to twice a month rather than once a month! :D I'll be trying my best to update the first week of the month and the last week of the month from now on, but if there's a lot of interest I might do more! <3
> 
> Anyway, I hope you're all doing well. It's scary times we live in, but if we're careful we'll make it through all this crap.
> 
> Enjoy!~

Two days Yuuri stayed pent-up in his apartment. His stomach had gotten upset from the alcohol and he felt much too miserable to go out. Luckily, he had groceries for a little while and wouldn’t need to restock for another two weeks or so.

If he were being honest with himself, Yuuri wanted to stay in until after his heat. He still had a little while before it, though, and didn’t want to waste time just sitting around the house. So, job hunting became his hobby whenever he got onto his laptop.

Close to dinner time one night, Yuuri got a message from Viktor. He was asking about what type of food Yuuri enjoyed, to which Yuuri responded with a list of sweet and savory things, like meats and soups he used to love back home.

Thinking about food made him hungry, however, he really didn’t feel like cooking. It also reminded him that his stomach was still upset. The mixture of being a bit lazy and feeling ill ended up keeping him in bed, his curled stomach growling occasionally to remind him that he hadn’t eaten.

Eventually it got bad enough that he decided it was time for at least a small snack, maybe some crackers or a sandwich if he had the stuff for it.

While rummaging through the pantry with a salted cracker in his mouth, Yuuri heard a knock on his door that made him freeze. Who could be coming over around dinner time?

Was it a neighbor wanting to meet him? What if they wanted to come in? His apartment wasn’t messy or anything, but having someone invading his space while he didn’t feel well sounded  _ awful. _ And what if they were an  _ alpha? _

He stared at the door for a few moments in silence. Another knock came and a muffled voice called his name.

Viktor.

Yuuri gulped and the cracker fell from his mouth, his shaking hand barely catching it before it fell to the floor. Conflicting emotions tore through his chest, letting in the boiling anxiety he had been trying to avoid. It seeped in like lava, leaving him tense and feeling like he needed to  _ run. _ He couldn’t, though. There was nowhere  _ to _ run. He had to answer the door or face getting a text later, asking him why he mostly ignored Viktor these last few days, save for a few quick texts.

“C-coming!” he choked out after throwing the cracker in the trash.

Slowly, Yuuri made his way over to the door, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides, kneading the air. It was a very omegan action, one they did to comfort themselves, but he couldn’t stop himself from doing it.

When he answered the door, however, he instead gripped the handle and frame, keeping them still while he gave a very awkward smile to the tall alpha in front of him.

“H-hey. Hello.” His voice cracked and he gulped, not missing the worried look that flashed over Viktor’s face.

The alpha smiled a bit nervously, holding up the plastic bag in his hand. “Hello, Yuuri. You said something about not feeling well, so I thought I could bring you some juice and something to eat.”

Yuuri’s anxiety ebbed for a moment, a cool feeling putting out some of the fire in his ribcage and cheeks. “Why?” he blurted out. He hadn’t meant for it to sound so rude. The alpha’s kindness just hadn’t been expected.

Viktor took it in stride and chuckled. “Well, you’re new in the area and I seem to be one of the only people you know here so far. So, I figured, why not help you out?”

The omega blinked at him, his mouth open slightly. Viktor’s musk was just as nice as it had been in the elevator. He wanted the alpha to come in and scent the place, to ward off other alphas with the strong smell that Yuuri was basking in.

But that was his upcoming heat talking. The other part of him was split down the middle in its decision. Viktor doing this was  _ really _ nice, and turning him down would likely kill their budding relationship right away. On the other hand, however, having Viktor alone with him in his apartment could spell disaster.

“C-come in.” The side of him that wanted to make friends had won. He stepped aside and let Viktor in, watching the alpha like a hawk.

Viktor noticed it—it would be impossible not to—but didn’t say anything. He thought Yuuri was an alpha, so he probably just thought he was staring at him because he was invading his territory.

“This is quaint, I love it!” The alpha smiled and spun around to see the whole of the apartment. “It seems like it’s quite cozy. Are you enjoying it so far?”

Yuuri nodded. He tried to muster up something to say but his throat was dry from the cracker and anxiety. This is the first time he had been alone with an alpha like this, and he wasn’t sure if he could keep himself from panicking.

“That’s good!” Viktor set the plastic bag on the counter, digging into it and pulling each item out to showcase what he had brought. “I tried to get things that might help an upset stomach, so I hope these help.”

Much too cautiously, Yuuri guided his stiff legs over to the counter. His eyes scanned over the food items, surprised to find that Viktor had brought soup and juice, along with some chewable capsules for his stomach.

Viktor grabbed the bottle when he noticed Yuuri’s eyes land on it. He shook it a little to produce the obnoxious pill sound those bottles made. “You’ve just moved in, so I thought you might not have anything like this. Are these alright?”

“Yeah, they’re...um, thank you.” Yuuri forced a smile. He had to show the alpha that he really did appreciate what he was doing, even though he was unknowingly making Yuuri uncomfortable.

“It’s not a problem!” He set the bottle back on the counter, grabbing the bowls of soup. The plastic lids were fogged over, the smell seeping through to Yuuri’s sensitive nose. “I got you pork since you said you liked that, but if you don’t feel like that right now I got chicken so we could switch if you’d like.”

“Pork is perfect.” Yuuri eagerly grabbed the bowl, his appetite pushing his anxiety to the side to fill his empty stomach. If there was any path to getting Yuuri to open up, it was one paved with pork.

The alpha watched happily while Yuuri began to dig in, his own food going untouched. He only picked it up and took the top off after Yuuri gave him a curious glance, the fake alpha’s mouth too full to ask why he was staring.

“Is it good? I’ve only had this place once a while ago. I thought of it because it was on the way.” Viktor waited for Yuuri’s response to start eating, his spoon at the ready for his approval.

“I like it,” he mumbled through his chewing. “Of course, I haven’t eaten all day, so my judgment on food is probably off…” Yuuri swallowed his mouthful, trying not to look away from Viktor’s attentive eyes. Any time an alpha stared at him for too long, Yuuri’s skin would crawl in two ways. He just wished his body could decide if it were scared of Viktor or if it wanted him in the nest he would soon be making for his heat.

“Wonderful!” The alpha dug in almost as hungrily as Yuuri had. Based on his reaction, he seemed to enjoy it as well.

Yuuri’s eating slowed when he got about halfway through his bowl. His stomach protested at how quickly he ate but he didn’t feel the need to puke so he simply slowed down to help it.

Still not sure why Viktor was being so nice, Yuuri eyed him skeptically. There wasn’t anything yet that suggested he wanted sex. If anything, he just seemed genuinely nice. A decent alpha that wanted to be friends with Yuuri. If that were true, this would be great for him and his adjustment, especially since Viktor was being so patient with him.

“I agree, this is delicious! You’ve got good taste, Yuuri.” Viktor’s smile was contagious. When he flashed it between bites, Yuuri couldn’t help but smile too.

His eyes landed on the drinks that came with the food. Yuuri pointed to them. “Which one is mine?”

“Whichever one you want.”

Not wanting to pick the one that Viktor probably bought for himself, Yuuri thought of what he had told Viktor he liked. Out of the two drinks, there was grape juice and orange juice. Orange juice was better for being sick, but grape juice was more savory.

Picking up the grape juice, Yuuri thanked the alpha again for the food. “This was really nice of you. You didn’t have to bring me anything.”

Viktor shrugged and set his bowl down, the plastic spoon that had come with it nearly sinking into the soup. “Like I said, you seemed like you could use the help. I know all too well how stressful it can be coming to a new area, especially coming from another country to America. It’s a big change, and I want to be a friendly face you can count on.”

Yuuri’s mind went into another flurry of emotions and thoughts. Viktor  _ was _ really nice. A nice alpha that just wanted to help him. One that wanted to make sure he was okay. But what would he do if he knew Yuuri wasn’t really an alpha? What would he still be this nice? He had defended omegas back at the rink when the other Yuri had been bad-mouthing them. Did he actually think that, or was he just saying it to be nice?

And what if Yuuri let Viktor into his life and had to eventually tell him the truth? Would the alpha be mad at him for lying? Would he suddenly change? After all, it was impossible to truly know someone, even after being around each other for years.

“Are you feeling alright?” The concern in Viktor’s eyes eased Yuuri.

It would be nearly impossible for someone with such caring eyes to turn around and be cruel. Yuuri hoped, anyway. He would just have to go with his gut and see how things played out.

“I’m okay. Still a little queasy is all.” He swallowed thickly and took a sip of the grape juice. “Thank you. What you’re doing it’s… I really appreciate it.”

“It’s no problem, really! I’m just glad I can be helpful in some way.” Viktor’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he took a moment to answer it, a small frown flashing on his lips. “It seems I have some things I need to do before the day is over.” He packed his leftovers and drink back in the bag. “I hope you feel better soon. Please don’t hesitate to call or text me should you need anything.”

Yuuri smiled back at him, placing his bowl down so that he could walk Viktor to the door. “S-sorry you couldn’t stay. Thank you again for stopping by.” Though he was relieved that Viktor wasn’t staying long, part of Yuuri couldn’t help but wish the alpha would stick around just a bit longer so his scent would soak into the apartment.

“Of course. Anytime, Yuuri.”

After a slightly awkward goodbye at the door—Yuuri taking much too long to close the door while Viktor walked away—the omega was left alone again in his apartment. His stomach fluttered wildly for a few reasons.

He didn’t think he’d ever find himself sniffing the air, trying to cling to the scent of an alpha. Most of what he could smell was the soup, but the warmth of it reminded him of the strong, heady scent Viktor had. There was a chance he would always associate the alpha with the smell now, but he was alright with that.

Viktor was turning out to be the kind of alpha that could help Yuuri heal. His move was proving to be helpful and he hadn’t even been there a month. He hadn’t even thought about panicking almost the entire time the alpha had been there thanks to the kindness he had shown.

It was a breath of fresh air, one that Yuuri happily inhaled when he laid down to sleep after cleaning up his leftovers, his shirt pressed against his nose so he could fall asleep to the smell of soup and alpha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Need me a man like Viktor ;w;
> 
> Hope you enjoyed! Comments and kudos are always well-appreciated! Check out my other social media (links in profile) for updates on my other projects and whatnot <3


	5. Heated Worry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting this from my phone so sorry if it's weird at all :p
> 
> I'm doing my best to do two updates this month so closer to the end of this month there will be another chapter! >:3c if people are still super interested in this fic I'll see about adding it to my weekly schedule :D
> 
> Content warning: Panic attack due to trauma involving rape
> 
> Enjoy!~

The days leading up to Yuuri’s heat were some of the best he had in a long time.

Every time he stepped into the rink, Viktor greeted him so warmly that he had started to look forward to the sound of the alpha’s voice while he tied his skates. The others were always far too busy practicing on their own, Yuri so focused that Yuuri could swear he went to a whole other planet while he skated.

“You know, those skates look like they’ve seen better days.” Viktor had planted himself on the other side of the bench, once again respecting Yuuri’s personal bubble more than most other alphas ever had. “You come here a lot, have you considered getting some new ones?”

Yuuri shrugged, flexing his toes in the worn-down skates. “Breaking in new ones sounds like it would be a lot of work. That and… Well, I haven’t found new work here yet and they’re expensive. Americans use cars more than I thought so a lot of places that hire here ask if I have a car. And when I say no, they seem to think that means I can’t just walk.” That and the idea of meeting a whole slew of new people, especially right before his heat, made his skin crawl.

“Why don’t I buy you a pair?” Viktor turned to face him better, smiling the wonderfully soft way he always did. “If you don’t mind another alpha buying you things, that is. I know some take it as a blow to their pride, but I really don’t mean anything negative by it. And I can help you break them in.”

“Oh, no, no, that’s so kind of you, but that’s too much. Er, I mean, accepting a gift like that would make me feel bad.” Viktor wouldn’t go for a cheap pair, Yuuri knew that for a fact, and if he didn’t want to be indebted to him. Though, he also had a feeling that Viktor wouldn’t look at it that way. “That’s very kind of you to offer, Viktor. I don’t take offense to it.”

The alpha tapped on his chin. “If you’re sure, Yuuri. But I really wouldn’t mind. You seem to like skating a lot and you could get really hurt if those fall apart during your time on the ice. And I wouldn’t mind taking you under my wing as your coach. Yuri might cry about it, but I can work with you both.”

“C-coach? Me?” Yuuri gripped the edge of the metal bench. He couldn’t do any of this professionally. If they found out he was an omega they would surely cast him aside. And there were physicals he would have to go through that would expose him immediately. Viktor would be disappointed in him and regret buying the skates anyway. “I… don’t know about that.”

“Come on, Yuuri, we can make a day of it. Nothing wrong with two friends going out on the town to find new skates. Even if you don’t want to be coached, I still don’t want to see you get hurt in the rink.” Viktor scooted a little closer, his scent hitting Yuuri like a wall.

“It can’t be any time soon,” he said quickly. “I have, uh, I mean- My rut is coming up really soon. I may not seem like it, but I’m _very_ territorial and aggressive during them, so I really can’t be around another alpha. Probably after today until a day or so after it’s passed.”

Viktor leaned back, looking Yuuri up and down quickly. “That’s alright. I, myself, tend to be quite tame during them, but I do understand that living in a new space has probably made you even more territorial.” He stood, fixing the creases in his long-sleeved shirt. “Since it seems like this will be your last session before your rut, I shouldn’t keep you from skating. But please do think about my offer, even if it’s just about getting new skates.”

Yuuri nodded then was left alone on the bench, which only grew colder and colder without Viktor’s presence. Skating did sound fun, it would help tire him out so that he could sleep through the first wave of his heat easier. But being next to Viktor was one thing, and being around the others was a whole other thing. Would their scents distress him? They didn’t usually come too close to him in the rink, but if they did, would it bother him?

He hadn’t even thought about any of that before leaving, only that he wanted to skate and see Viktor. Which had thrown him off more than the heat. Being comfortable, even in the slightest, around an alpha didn’t seem possible. Of course, he still didn’t fully trust Viktor, but something in his gut told him that Viktor wouldn’t hurt him. Even if he got the chance, the alpha was far too kind.

Eventually, Yuuri pulled himself off the bench, making it to the other side of the rink with his headphones playing some soft orchestral music. There were a couple of other people there, betas, who kept to the sides of the rink, cutting into Yuuri’s usual space, but he ignored them like he ignored Yuri and Otebek.

The heat slowly beginning to boil deep in his muscles had calmed from the chill of the rink and the music relaxed his limbs enough for him to gracefully glide across the ice. He took in occasional deep breaths to cool off even further, however, they only came through his mouth so that his nose didn’t pick up any of the betas or alphas. For the first time in a long time, he could completely relax despite there being other people around him. Even the alphas were so far out of his own little world that he didn’t have an ounce of worry tensing his shoulders.

Well, _one_ of the alphas stayed on his mind.

No matter how much he wished his heat didn’t make him want for an alpha, it still begged him to pick a mate, someone to ease the pain of it and take care of him. And, of course, his body was hooked on Viktor. The alpha who had been the nicest to him and smelled like comfort wouldn’t leave his thoughts. And his offer didn’t leave either.

If he found some way around it, if he could maybe trust Viktor one day, could he at least try? And what would getting new skates really hurt? Once he got a job he could find a gift for the alpha in return. But then again, that might make it look like they were courting each other. Alphas dating wasn’t _completely_ unheard of. But he wasn’t actually an alpha and if he started to act like he wanted to date Viktor then he’d _have_ to tell him the truth and-

“Yuuri? Are you alright?”

Yuuri blinked, removing his headphones. Viktor stood in front of him and had shouted over his music, waving his hand to try and snap him out of his thoughts. “I- What?”

“You skated over to me and then just stood there. I think you should go home, your rut might be starting soon. I know even the early stages can make it hard to focus and you mentioned that you were territorial so your body is likely uncomfortable in this space.”

Yuri skated over to them, flipping his blond hair mostly out of his face. “You? Territorial? I don’t see it. You don’t have the muscles or face for it.”

Viktor stuck his legs out and nudged Yuri, the force of it and the smoothness of the ice sending the other alpha back. “Be nice, he’s got plenty of muscle. More than you, skinny boy. Go do some stretches or something.”

His body was _way_ too invested in the idea of Viktor if he had mindlessly wandered over to him. And if he didn’t hurry home, there was a chance he’d start to smell off and his blockers wouldn’t help anymore and if Viktor could smell his heat he could stop being such a nice person and if Viktor wasn’t even nice then what hope was there for other alphas?

“I’ll call you a cab, okay? Walk with me off the ice.”

Once again, Viktor’s soft voice brought Yuuri’s head out of the clouds. He nodded at the alpha, following him off the ice over to the bench where his bag sat. Viktor continued to speak to him, though a lot of the words went into one ear and right out the other. Alphas were so _warm._ Why did Viktor have to give off heat like that? And why did he have to smell so good? Skating had made him sweat and his scent glands were giving off nothing but comfort.

“Move your leg for me, please.”

Yuuri looked down at his feet which were void of any skates. Viktor had taken them off and was putting on his normal shoes, reassuring him the entire time. If his mind fog hadn’t become so thick from the alpha’s scent, he’d be an embarrassed mess. Instead, he leaned forward, taking in a deep breath through his nose for the first time that day.

Which had been a monumental mistake.

A needy trill nearly bubbled up his throat but his body, fearful of what it would attract, clenched the muscles shut at the last moment and caused him to break out into a coughing fit. He had to wave Viktor off, the alpha hovering way too close. His heat was almost on him, the early stages of it already digging their claws into his core and making it nearly impossible to focus.

Thankfully, fear was on his side for once. Yuuri was able to stand, grab his bag, and move away from Viktor who looked severely confused and even a little upset.

“Sorry, I have to go. Your scent is freaking me out.”

“That’s okay, Yuuri,” he hummed. “I hope I didn’t offend you at all. The cab should be outside by the time you walk to the front, I’ve taken care of it. Get home safely, okay?”

Yuuri nodded, gripping the strap of his bag so hard that his hand had nearly gone numb. If he could focus on that instead of how Vitkor’s heavy scent was lingering on his clothes, he could make it home and be fine. His apartment had been readied for this and if he could just make it through the door, everything would be fine.

But, of course, the cab ride came first. The beta driver said hello to him but didn’t attempt to make any conversation after Yuuri only grunted at him in response. Maybe a conversation would have helped him, but Yuuri wasn’t sure he could hold one. All he could focus on was Viktor’s scent, how uncomfortably his skin sat on his muscles, and how impossibly long the ride home was.

Every building they went by blurred into one big string of colors. And each one passed by in slow motion, dragging Yuuri’s internal clock back a few seconds with it. By the time they stopped at his place, he was sure he had aged ten years.

Yuuri thanked the man, nearly forgetting his bag as he scrambled out of the car and into the building. If he were any stronger, he would have broken the button of the elevator when he slammed his hand onto it. Just a little longer. A little longer until he could lay in his nest and wait this out.

His legs moved like bricks tied to jello when the doors finally opened, barely making it to his door and getting inside of it before they refused to move anymore. Yuuri slid down the closed door in relief, unable to keep himself standing. At least he was in his apartment. Safety over comfort.

Of course, thinking that only kept him there on the floor for so long. His body allowed him to strip down to his boxers, the heat too much for anything else, then worked its way up to moving to his nest where he could actually sleep and feel the safest. Most omegas would lay in their nests and call out for an alpha, or move around a bunch to try and escape the horrible way their bodies felt.

But Yuuri could only hide under the covers and whimper. Every time he heard even the smallest of noises he would flinch and his heart would nearly beat out of his chest, his entire body ready for someone to drag him out of his nest and hurt him. What if his scent blockers by the door and windows didn’t work right? What if one of his neighbors had seen him stumble home and knew he was in a vulnerable position? Would anyone come to help this time if he cried loudly enough for help?

Tears that were somehow hotter than his boiling skin poured over his cheeks and Yuuri could swear he was drowning in them because as soon as they came he couldn’t breathe. All he wanted to do was _breathe_ and he couldn't find a safe way to pull in any air because the second he got any his body refused to believe that he was being allowed the privilege of it and coughed it back out.

Every heat since the incident was like this. Half of the time Yuuri was _sure_ that he’d die during them, but he knew eventually he’d calm down and make it through it. That didn’t help at the moment, though. Nothing ever did. As soon as the memories of being held down resurfaced he was stuck reliving it all until the heat passed.

Except, that time the second his mind tried to remember the worst of it, a soft voice sent him somewhere else. Instead of being thrown down onto cold concrete, Yuuri hit ice and was back to the moment he had hurt his shoulder after meeting Viktor.

The other alpha stood on the ice in winter clothes, his breath a thick fog in front of his face. “You should be more careful, Yuuri.”

It was a dream. Or some sort of hallucination. Yuuri knew it was. But for the first time in a long time, his heat-muddled brain had something to think of aside from his past.

Viktor stepped forward, each step removing an item of clothing until he stood in only his boxers as well. “Would you like to skate with me?”

His scent came through so well. How could Yuuri smell him so vividly in a dream? He forced himself to open his eyes, confident that the alpha had to be right there with him. But he wasn’t. Instead, Yuuri had brought the shirt he was wearing to the nest and had it pressed to his face. Once again, he had mindlessly gone to Viktor in a way. His body knew his scent would comfort him and went right for the thing that smelled the most like him.

If his instincts could trust the alpha so much, why shouldn’t he just tell Viktor and let the alpha be there for him? Yuuri was pretty sure he was interested in him and any alpha would jump at the chance to be with an omega. There weren’t many of them to go around, Viktor would be proud to have one.

But what if he thought Yuuri was too needy? What if he saw how he reacted during his heats and wanted nothing to do with him? What sort of omega had panic attacks just from going into heat? No alpha would want to deal with that, they would just want to get through the heat and have a good time.

It wouldn’t be fair to put someone through all his bullshit. It wouldn’t be fair of him to ask someone to keep his secret, either.

Though, Yuuri’s panicked mind didn’t have any problem with keeping the shirt pressed to his face. Whether he would tell Viktor or not, at least Yuuri could use his scent like a crutch for the time being. Until his heat ended and his head had cleared up, he could just pretend that Viktor would be there for him and take the news well. So long as it kept the past away, he was fine with pretending.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Yuuri. Hopefully Viktor can continue to help, even if it's unintentional owo
> 
> Thanks again for the comments and stuff, I didn't think so many people would like this story but I'm super happy y'all do! <3


	6. Giving In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I was supposed to post this forever ago, but my life got hella hectic af ;w; I'm doing my best to keep to my writing schedule, but this project is still not quite a priority. Rest assured, I won't forget about it! It's the only ABO story I'm doing right now and I really like ABO so I'm way into it, it's just not the thing that pulls the most attention because I have other, longer projects going.
> 
> But one of them is about to wrap up so I'll be moving my schedule around and trying to fit this one in more often, so let's hope it works out! ^-^ Follow me on Insta (same username) if you want writing updates and all that jazz ;D
> 
> Anyway, this chapter features a panic attack that deals with Yuuri's trauma (poor Yuuri D:) so just a heads up for that! <3
> 
> Enjoy!~

To say his phone had blown up with messages during his heat would be an understatement. Viktor, his mother, and some friends from home had all texted or left voicemails, wishing him luck. They likely remembered that his heat was coming around again and wanted to make sure he was doing alright on his own. However, Yuuri didn’t read most of the other messages. Instead, he tapped on Viktor’s name and quickly dragged his blurry eyes over every word.

[5:47 PM]  _ Hope your rut is going well! I find a hot bath helps me when I come out of it. You should try to add bubbles too! _

[11:20 AM]  _ When you can reply, please tell me what your favorite color is. _

[2:36 PM]  _ Sorry for bothering you again, I wanted to know if you like chocolate or vanilla more? Call me after your bubble bath! _

Yuuri let out an exhausted laugh and let his phone fall onto his mattress. A bubble bath did sound nice, but a shower was quicker and he needed to get food in him before he withered away to nothing. Though, cooking also sounded like a huge chore that he didn’t want to do.

Immediately, his mind went to the time Viktor had brought over that yummy soup. He knew all he had to do was ask and the alpha would come running with whatever he wanted. But that was a problem. Wasn’t it? Or was it a good thing? Every fiber of his being told him that he could trust the alpha, that Viktor would never hurt him. Not on purpose or in a physical way, anyway.

Maybe the alpha wouldn’t hit him or some other horrible thing, but he could react badly to the news. Was getting free food worth having him find out? His stomach said yes, however his body screamed at him to just stay in bed and not do anything instead, not even a shower. He could try to hide the fact that he was an omega, sure. If he felt like getting up and cleaning his entire apartment, that is. And at that point, he would spend less energy just making his own food.

The more he thought, the less he wanted to get up at all. His stomach demanded that he decide on  _ something _ and after what had to be an hour of arguing with himself, Yuuri compromised on cleaning and getting rid of the smell of his heat then inviting Viktor over so that he could get some really good food with no effort. Of course, that hinged on if his suspicions about Viktor being a doting alpha were correct.

[4:02 PM]  _ I like blue and vanilla. Thank you for the bubble bath idea. I was too tired to take one and decided on a shower instead. I was thinking of ordering something for dinner because just the shower made me tired _

Right after sending the text, Yuuri’s anxiety shot him out of bed and immediately started to pull it apart. Everything that had too strong of a scent on it was put into a large plastic bag and sprayed with air freshener to be hidden away until he could do laundry. His phone had gone off while he was cleaning so as soon as he got the worst of it put away, he checked the notification.

[4:04 PM]  _ What do you want for dinner? I can bring you something if you’d like? If you are okay with guests so soon that is _

[4:11 PM]  _ Anything would be fine, I’m starving _

Thrilled that the alpha was bringing him food, Yuuri had a bit more pep in his step as he actually took a shower, scrubbing himself down until his skin was pink from the hot water and force of his hands. Then, he vacuumed the entire place, opened the kitchen window a tiny bit, and then replaced all of the scent blockers and stuffed anything else with his scent in the closet in his room. Then, for good measure, he sprayed all of that with air freshener as well.

[4:25 PM]  _ I’ll be there in twenty minutes with a local favorite! _

That had been sent almost twenty minutes before Yuuri checked his phone. Viktor would be there any second and he had cleaned just in time. He sat on his couch, letting his head fall back so that he could relax his exhausted, starving body.

When Viktor knocked on his door, reality crashed around him. Had he really just invited an alpha over right after his heat for food? Instincts had beat his anxiety, the raging worry kept in a cage for just long enough to make him do something stupid.

The omega side of him, still holding his anxiety by the throat, pushed him to get the door, smiling sweetly at the alpha as soon as he came into view. He couldn’t help but take notice of how incredibly appealing Viktor looked, his tight T-shirt showing off how broad his chest was. And his scent, oh how Yuuri wished his entire apartment could smell as rich as he did. Though, that could have been the food he was carrying.

“Hello, Yuuri! You look so tired, I’m glad I brought you food!” The alpha came right in, going to the kitchen area to set the food down on the counter. “It’s always nice to have someone help out after a rut, even though it’s not always ideal to let someone in on your territory so soon.”

Yuuri shrugged, closing the door and following his nose to the scent of the food. “Thank you for coming by. What did you get?” He stuck his nose forward, closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath. It was his stomach’s turn to take charge and it pushed Viktor’s scent right out of the way. Beef. Veggies. Maybe some soy sauce?

“There’s a place here that I really like with Chinese food. It’s not authentic by any means, but it’s really good. I know you’re probably used to some very delicious Japanese cuisine, and I assure you, it’s not nearly as good and it has been very Americanized, though it’s good in its own way.”

Americanized Chinese food didn’t smell too bad. “I’m sure I’ll like anything right now.”

Viktor laughed, handing Yuuri one of the styrofoam containers. “I’ve heard it’s also good for alphas after ruts. Plenty of salt and proteins.” Grabbing his own container, Viktor popped it open and handed Yuuri one of the plastic forks from the bag. “I’ve had this place a few times and it’s never let me down, but I won’t be offended if you don’t like it.”

Yuuri gave a short hum, already twirling his fork in the beef chow mein to get a large mouthful of the food. The alpha had been right about the salt. Even the vegetables had it cooked right into every pore, drying out his tongue only for the juices in the meat to soak it again. His body didn’t care in the least bit, taking the container of food over to the couch so that he could stuff his face.

The alpha joined him, smiling while the two of them ate in silence.

Did Viktor think it was odd that the place didn’t smell like Yuuri at all? Was he not talking because Yuuri had been rude about eating so quickly and not saying thank you more? What if he  _ could _ smell some of the heat? Maybe he wasn’t talking because he had figured it out and wasn’t sure how to respond.

And, oh god, Yuuri had done the most basic, annoying omegan thing he could have done. He used Viktor’s kindness to get something he wanted. He had tricked the man into pampering him. Wasn’t that what he and Yuri had been complaining about? That omegas were nothing but snooty people who thought they should be taken care of at all times? What if Viktor had figured it out and was angry at him or thought he was annoying?

“Yuuri, are you alright?”

He had stopped eating. Yuuri stared down at the food in shame, tears falling over his cheeks. “I’m sorry. I know you hate- I mean, everyone thinks- I shouldn’t have made you come here.”

Viktor closed his container and set it aside. “Yuuri, you didn’t make me do anything. I came here because I like you and spending time with you is nice. I know you’re also an alpha-”

“What?” Yuuri’s eyes shot up and he dropped his fork into his noodles.

“Yes, Yuuri, I know, it’s not common. If you aren’t someone who likes that, I’m okay with it and won’t press further. But, I want you to know you don’t have to worry about what other people think with me. I have a strong presence and won’t-”

“That’s not- You’re-”

How did Viktor not notice something was off? Couldn’t everyone? He was so bad at hiding it, anyone that looked at Yuuri had to know he wasn’t an alpha. “Viktor,” he breathed out, “I’m not- I’m not actually-” His jaw tensed, not allowing him to get the rest out. How could he tell an alpha that he was an omega when they were alone in a small space?

The alpha sighed, placing his hand on Yuuri’s shoulder. “I know, Yuuri. I had a feeling that you’re not an alpha. I was wondering why a beta might-”

For whatever reason, Viktor not realizing the actual truth made things so, so much worse. And the  _ touch, _ why was he being touched? Pain followed touch, especially the strong, burning touch of an alpha. Yuuri flinched away, his body sucking in a gulp of air. He nearly knocked his food off his lap, but Viktor grabbed it and set it out of the way, taking his hand off of Yuuri the second he had gasped.

“I’m sorry, you’re okay,” he said softly. “I shouldn’t have touched you without asking.”

Yuuri tried to respond, he really did. To apologize for being a big baby, to tell Viktor that it was all nothing and that he was fine. But no words came out. Only tears and gasps for air. Had the room suddenly become smaller? Why was the couch so hot? The touch had gone but it would be back, wouldn’t it? His clothes had a death grip on him and the collar of his shirt choked him he couldn’t breathe why couldn’t he breathe he had to  _ move _ —

“You’re safe, Yuuri. No one’s going to hurt you.”

Viktor’s soft voice, as it had in his heat, pulled Yuuri’s mind out of the deepest pit of the fog. Getting his breathing under control wasn’t happening anytime soon, but Yuuri had been lulled far enough back into reality to realize he had curled up on the couch, hugging his knees tight enough to make his arms ache and tremble. The alpha next to him surely smelled the scent of a distressed omega. There was no hiding it now. No amount of stuttering out some lie or cleaning could fix his mistake. Viktor knew.

“I don’t care what your secondary gender is, Yuuri. And I’m very sorry if I’ve ever done anything to make you think otherwise. I don’t know the kind of struggles omegas go through or why you have to act like an alpha, but this must be terrifying for you. I think you’re stronger than any alpha, and I’m proud of you for being able to pull this off like you have.”

“You’re just saying nice things to calm me down,” Yuuri whispered. Viktor’s accent, tone, and genuine words could put Yuuri to sleep. With his body still on alert, though, it sobered him up instead. “I-I’m not brave for playing pretend.”

“Just because you had to wear a mask to look something dangerous in the eye doesn’t mean you’re any less brave. It just means you needed a little help. And there’s nothing wrong with that. We all need help sometimes.” Viktor moved off the couch, sitting in front of Yuuri on the floor. Not many alphas would be willing to put themselves before an omega like that. “How can I help you during these times? Everyone is different, I can see you don’t like touch, so please tell me if I get too close.”

Too nice. Viktor was being too nice. No one was this nice, except for Yuuri’s mom and she certainly wasn’t there to help him. He only had Viktor there and he hardly knew him. The alpha  _ seemed _ like he actually wanted to help. And had he said he  _ liked _ Yuuri? And implied that it was in a romantic way? Or had he just been talking about being friends?

“You confuse me,” he forced out, his voice almost too soft to hear.

Viktor laughed. “You confuse me too, sometimes. I think everyone is a little confusing, in their own ways.” The alpha leaned back on his hands, tilting his head to the side. “Would you like to talk about it? What’s wrong, I mean. I’ve been told I’m a great listener! But if you need some space instead, I’m okay with that too. Whatever you need me to do, I can do. But you have to communicate with me, I’m far from a mind reader.”

The secret was out. Viktor sat before him completely open and unafraid, unthreatening. Would it be so bad to blurt it all out? Maybe he could help Yuuri. Even if all he could do was listen, that in itself would probably be nice. There hadn’t been many times where Yuuri thought that he even could spit out what was wrong, what he had been through. But seeing Viktor smiling in his usual friendly way reinforced every good thing that he had ever thought about the alpha.

Viktor wouldn’t hurt him and he would be nice. He just knew it.

“Okay,” Yuuri said softly. “I… I think I would like to talk. Just a little.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Viktor knows! :O Let's see if Yuuri can actually tell him what's wrong tho lmao
> 
> Comments and kudos are very appreciated! <3


	7. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo, sorry this is so late after I said I'd try to update this twice a month ;w; I got writer's block SUPER hard and was trying to finish up another one of my fics before continuing on with this one.
> 
> BUT this one has become part of my regular writing schedule so I'm r e a l l y hoping to put it out at least every other week >:3c
> 
> If you'd ever like to see updates on when I'll be posting, follow me on Instagram or Tumblr under this same username ^-^
> 
> Enjoy!~

“I don’t know how much of this I’ll be able to say,” Yuuri whispered, his confidence in himself and his ability to relive the experience dying quickly. His heat forced him to see it all again just hours ago, could he really do it again so soon?

Viktor still sat on the floor in front of him, looking quite comfortable even though Yuuri had gone quiet for some time to collect his thoughts. “That’s alright. You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to. You don’t owe me an explanation. I’d  _ like _ to hear a little bit of it so that I can help you better, but it’s not for me to say whether or not you want to share.”

Whether he wanted to or not wasn’t really up to Yuuri. The last few times he had even tried to talk to someone about it his jaw refused to move and every sound he attempted to force out got stuck in the bottom of his throat. All he could ever do was spit out a few slow words then he had to stop or he’d end up unable to speak and stuck in his mind for hours. Even the small bubble of confidence Viktor’s kindness gave him didn’t seem to change that.

“I can’t,” he whispered. “It was-” Yuuri took in a deep breath. “It was bad. I-I couldn’t- They-”

“Yuuri, you’re okay. Take in slow breaths through your nose then let them out through your mouth.” Viktor held out his hand with his palm up. “If you want or need touch, you can grab my hand at any time to anchor yourself.”

Touch would have to wait, of that much Yuuri was sure. Even though he knew in his core that Viktor wasn’t there to hurt him, an alpha’s warmth would only make things so much worse. At least, he was pretty sure that was true. He wasn’t brave enough to test it. He did, however, listen to the advice on taking in calming breaths.

“I-I  _ have _ to pretend to be an alpha,” he managed. Telling Viktor that he was hiding his secondary sex wasn’t the same as telling his trauma, which made it just a bit easier to spit out. “It’s safer. Omegas- No one likes us.”

“I understand, Yuuri. It’s a cruel world we live in and you have every right to protect yourself.” Viktor rested his hand on the couch beside Yuuri. “I’ll help you in whatever way that I can, too. Though, I’m not sure if we can hide it forever from the others if you plan on continuing to skate.”

“I don’t know if I’ll skate enough to worry about that.” Having Viktor know his secret was one thing, but if anyone else learned—other alphas—that a lone omega lived in the area, Yuuri would be in danger all over again. “I just need to find a job in the area where I won’t be close to anyone long enough for them to realize then I’ll be okay.”

Viktor hummed, tilting his head to the side. “I’ve made a few friends in the area during my time here. I’m sure I can help you find something. But I do love to watch you skate and I can tell you love it, too. You always look so at peace when you’re on the ice like nothing can bother you there.”

So Viktor had been watching him skate, enough to notice how relaxed Yuuri was. Thinking about it, though, Yuuri knew the alpha was right about how it made him feel. When he was on the ice, nothing got to him. “I- There’s just a lot I can’t do, Viktor. I  _ want  _ to-”

“You can do anything you set your mind to,” Viktor interrupted with his usual cheery tone. “I mean it, Yuuri. You can do anything. I know your life has set up mountains that seem impossible to climb, but it’s best to keep a positive attitude as often as possible.” He sat up a little straighter, pushing his silver hair out of his face. “I don’t mean to sound pushy, Yuuri, but if you want to skate, you can skate. I can help you do that and you can work a regular job on the side in case you decide it’s really not for you.”

“And what do you get out of it?” The snippy tone had forced its way out and immediately, Yuuri regretted it. Viktor wouldn’t hurt him and he was just trying to help. “I-I’m sorry,” he sighed, despite seeing that the alpha didn’t seem the least bit bothered by his rudeness. “Usually alphas don’t just do nice things for omegas, you know. And what if- W-what if I couldn’t ever give you anything in return? Physically or emotionally?” Viktor  _ had _ sounded like he was about to ask Yuuri out before the truth slipped out, he had to be sure the alpha knew that he may never be ready for anything like that.

The air between them thickened for only a moment, thinned out by the sound of Viktor’s quiet laughter. “Yuuri, you can set whatever boundaries you need to. While I would like to date you and see where things go, I’m also more than happy to simply be your friend. We haven’t known each other long, but I like what I’ve seen so far and would like to spend more time with you, even if it’s just as friends.”

Friends. Right. An alpha could want to be nothing more than friends. He had grown up with some alphas that were only friends. It was completely possible. Possible and something he should definitely go for because he needed help, seeing as he wasn’t making much progress on his own.

“C-can I think about the skating thing? I want to make sure I have a stable job first, then I can focus on hobbies.” Yuuri looked at the hand that Viktor had yet to move, wondering if he could stomach the touch to let the alpha know that he didn’t see him as a threat. His gut told him no, not yet. Maybe someday he could use Viktor for physical comfort, but for now, he would have to use his words. “Thank you, though. For the help. And keeping my secret.”

“Take all the time you need. I’m a professional skater myself that’s doing some coaching this season, so I can help you perfect it as a hobby or do more with it, too.” Viktor stood, stretching out his long limbs, though he didn’t peacock as most alphas would have. “I’ll gladly keep your secret and do whatever I can to help you. I’ll even start calling around to help you find a job so that we can skate together soon.”

“That would be a huge help.” Yuuri stood as well, recognizing that the alpha was about to leave. “A-and if you ever need anything, I can do my best to help.” Not that he had much to offer. Until he got out of his own head and got a job, Yuuri was mostly useless. But someone like Viktor deserved at least the option to reach out to him if the alpha needed someone to talk to.

Viktor smiled and collected his leftovers, motioning to Yuuri’s. “Please try to eat some more. You need the energy after your heat. I have some errands I have to go take care of, but if you need anything, I always have my phone on me.”

After another thank you and a goodbye, Yuuri walked Viktor to the door, watching the alpha disappear down the hall to the elevator. When he closed his front door and was finally left alone, a wave of worry and relief washed over him like a confusing yet comforting blanket.

An alpha he barely knew now had his life in his hands. Though, every fiber of his being screamed that he could trust Viktor. If he were a beta Yuuri might have jumped at the chance for a date. He could probably handle a simple date with a beta to see what could come from it. Alphas were most certainly off the table, maybe forever, but if Viktor had been a beta, things would be different.

Was that even fair of him to say? Yuuri didn’t know. What the universe counted as fair or unfair never made sense, he didn’t want to bother his tired mind with it right then. Or ever, really. He needed to finish eating then clean up some more before taking additional time to rest his body. Despite his heat being relatively smooth, it still kicked his butt more than he would’ve liked, and even though he couldn’t afford another day of sitting and doing nothing, he was going to do just that.

Yuuri sat back on the couch and opened his food again. It had grown cold, but that didn’t stop him from shoveling the rest of it into his mouth, not caring about how quickly or messily he was eating. A hungry omega was an unproductive omega.

Once he fueled up on the over-salted food, Yuuri lazily walked around the apartment making sure the place was clean enough for him to relax in. There wasn’t much to do in terms of cleaning, really, but it would bug him if the little things didn’t get picked up and put away and if the smell didn’t go back to being more neutral.

In bed, Yuuri laid on his back, eyes locked on the ceiling. He didn’t really know what to make of Viktor, not when the alpha was nicer than most people for seemingly no reason. Maybe his instincts just made him want to take care of the helpless omega. Maybe he really hoped for a relationship out of it in the end. Whatever the reason and no matter how nice, Yuuri would have to keep himself alert so that no funny business went on.

As for the skating, well, he wasn’t sure what to do about all that. Viktor could help him get super good at it and while that sounded nice, Yuuri knew omegas were far from welcome in the actual sport. Sure, a few have made it in throughout the years, but managing to beat alphas or even betas looked impossible. How was he supposed to compete with the likes of Yuri or the others he had seen effortlessly gliding on the ice?

He couldn’t. Not even his years of doing it as a hobby or his love for being on the ice could put Yuuri in their league. And none of them would want him, either. Viktor was nice, sure, but no one else would be nearly as welcoming. Also, he was pretty sure he had to put down his legal secondary sex on any paperwork they would have, which meant he couldn’t just lie his way in.

Which reminded him that any job he got would be the same. The second his boss looked at his paperwork, his secret would be out to yet another person. They wouldn’t legally be able to go out and tell everybody something they learned off of personal paperwork, but that rarely stopped most people. It wasn’t like Yuuri would be able to or want to fight something like that anyway. He would have to just turn in the papers and hope for the best.

Yuuri pulled one of his pillows over his face, hoping that it would trick his brain into feeling like he had checked out of reality for a second. It kind of did. He wished he could stay there forever, under his pillow and surrounded by his natural scent, without the worry of the world crushing his will to live.

Maybe someday none of this would bother him and he’d be able to do what he wanted without constant doubt making him second guess every little thing he did. But until then he just had to hope Viktor would be enough help to get him through the next couple of weeks. Or that he hadn’t embarrassed himself in front of the alpha too much with his crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuri is tired of his own self being so anxious and damn do I feel that lmao
> 
> Comments and kudos are super appreciated! <3


	8. New Faces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter! It's a little late but I've had a really stressful week ;w;
> 
> Check out my other social media (same username everywhere) to see what's going on with updates and how you can get stuff early/help support my writing ^-^ <3
> 
> Enjoy!~

Time passed as it always did, Yuuri finding himself hiding in his nest more often than not. It had only been two days since Viktor learned his secret, however, those two days dragged on. Every little noise left Yuuri on high-alert despite his trust in the alpha. He wouldn’t tell anyone and no alphas would come and find him if they found out.

Like some secret key to his problems, Yuuri kept that thought bouncing around in his head while he went about his day so that he didn’t spiral and end up in his nest again. He had been in the middle of making lunch when his phone chimed. Viktor, no doubt. 

[1:23PM]  _ I have big news! I have a friend that’s hiring at the place he owns. It’s a small convenience store only three streets away from your apartment! He said he can meet you today if you’re feeling up to it. _

A convenience store? Yuuri could do that. And the area wasn’t a terribly busy place, work would likely be slow and easy for him to manage. Walking that far every shift would get him in some exercise, too, which was good because he had become pretty sure that he wasn’t about to get serious about skating. Not when it could put him in so much danger.

[1:26PM]  _ That sounds good. What time should I go? I’ll need to shower first and it will take some time to walk there, so if it could be in about an hour that would be nice. _

[1:28PM]  _ I’m here now speaking with him, just come when you’re ready. I can call you a cab if you want? _

[1:29PM]  _ No, that’s fine, thank you. I will see you soon. _

Viktor was there? Talking to the manager? Was he telling him about his secret? He’d find out anyway after the paperwork was filled out. Maybe Viktor giving him a heads up would be a good thing? Or it could be a disaster. What if he showed up and the man wanted nothing to do with an omega? Most people thought omegas would turn their nose up at everyday work.

Anxiety aside, Yuuri needed this job. His savings could only stretch so far and there was no way he was going to ask his mom for more money. She had done enough for him. And so had Viktor. Yuuri wasn’t going to sit back and let them and others continue to pull his weight when he was capable of doing it on his own.

Moving with his mental momentum, Yuuri finished making his simple sandwich and ate it with vigor while finding his nice clothes, the text with the address awaiting him on his bed. With food in his stomach and his clothes ready he hopped in the shower, scrubbing himself raw with the soaps that would hide his natural scent and soak his skin with a faux alpha one.

The cool tile of the bathroom floor kept him moving quickly, the towel gliding over his skin and patting his hair dry faster than he had ever been able to do it before. Of course, his hair stayed slightly damp, but his time walking would do the job for him and he didn’t have time to waste on getting it perfect.

He nearly forgot his phone, however, anxiety gnawed at him to have a way to call for help should he need it. Yuuri didn’t mind walking and there was plenty of daylight to burn, but being safe was always better than being sorry.

[1:52PM]  _ He says he’s excited to meet you! I know it’s not the most glamorous job in the world, but they’re very nice and it pays surprisingly well! _

Every ounce of Viktor seemed to be made of optimism and Yuuri wasn’t sure if he liked it or envied it. How nice would it be to see the world through rose-colored glasses again? He doubted he’d ever be able to again. Maybe hanging out with Viktor might rub off on him. Yuuri could only hope.

Not many people were out walking around, much to Yuuri’s delight. Most people there were keen on driving everywhere and while Yuuri didn’t mind cars, he preferred to get the fresh air. Though, cars were safer. Not as out in the open and they got him to populated areas faster than his stiffening legs could. Why did his mind always have to bring him to a bad place? He just wanted to walk a few blocks, why was it impossible to do that without thinking about-

No, he wasn’t going to get worked up before meeting his potential employer. Yuuri could focus on the cement instead, the way the little cracks often had weeds growing in them. Some were large enough to trip someone if they weren’t paying attention. Luckily for him, paying attention was all Yuuri could do. Weirdly enough, so long as he kept his eyes on the gray slabs under his feet, he felt okay. No racing thoughts or pulse. Just the ground and where his feet were to go next.

Yuuri only stopped staring at his feet when he realized he had to be close. Looking up, his eyes immediately landed on the corner store where there were no cars parked in the tiny parking lot. Quiet and slow, how perfect.

The blue and white stripes around the bricked store gave a calming air to the place. It had to be older, although the condition of the place told Yuuri that the manager took good care of everything. How many other employees were there? The thought hadn’t even crossed Yuuri’s mind until he was pulling the handle of the glass door open.

“There you are! You look fantastic all dressed up.” Viktor had a brilliantly bright smile on his face, his arms open not for a hug but maximum cheerfulness. “Yuuri, this is Spencer and Sophie. Sophie is Spencer’s niece, but he doesn’t pick favorites so don’t worry about that.”

Yuuri looked at the two people behind the counter, the girl squinting her eyes at him and stepping forward, her hand on her chin. She was a beta, probably not much older than Yuuri, and more familiar than he thought someone in the area could be.

“I know you,” she hummed, her round face scrunching up as she came eye to eye with Yuuri. “You’re the guy that wanted to skate, aren’t you? I had a feeling I’d see you again! If I had known you’d end up being friends with Viktor here I would’ve walked you into the place myself and told him to tone his crazy self down.”

“I’m not crazy,” Viktor laughed. “I’m excited. Nothing wrong with having a zest for life! And I’m surprised to see that you two have met.”

“She told me how intense the alphas in the skating rink were.” Yuuri took a small step back from Sophie, smiling to show that he meant no harm by it. “She was very polite, I’m glad that if I’ll be working here it’ll be with someone like her.” If she was as nice as she had been that day then working there was going to be a breeze, especially since Spencer was also a beta.

Spencer stepped forward, offering his hand for Yuuri to shake. “Viktor has told me all about you, and if Sophie has met you already as well, then I think I’m perfectly fine with bringing you aboard. We’re short-handed now that Sophie is taking some college classes so having you to cover those shifts will be nice.”

Yuuri lit up, trying to contain the smile on his face. No more relying so much on others. No more sitting at home, allowing himself to feel more and more sorry about his situation. Finally, he had an excuse to leave the apartment to a place that wasn’t the rink where he had to worry so much about the alphas picking up on his sweat.

Though the paperwork came next and that meant he would have to show his ID, the damning mark of the omega there for anyone who needed it to see.

“Sophie, stay out here while we go back and talk some things out.” Spencer starts to walk to a door in the back and Viktor follows, much to Yuuri’s confusion.

“I told him you needed me there with you during this part,” the alpha said in a hushed voice. “It’ll be alright, I wouldn’t have suggested this if I didn’t think Spencer would be nice about it. If you can, you just need to trust me on this.”

Trust. That was something Yuuri was already affording Viktor, a lot of it, too. The alpha had yet to make him question that decision and he hoped that wouldn’t change as they walked into a small office, one that had nothing but a large desk with an old computer on it, and a filing cabinet next to a fridge. The place was so clean and organized, Yuuri couldn’t help but appreciate it.

“Now, today we can get the worst of it out of the way, like copying your ID and all that. I assume you have at least that, though you’ll need to send me any visas you got, too. I know it’s last-minute so I don’t blame you for not having all of that here.” Spencer sat in the little rolling chair that had been tucked into the desk. “Viktor tells me you came here not too long ago from Japan, that must be exciting. I’ve always wanted to go.”

“I did, yes. And if you get the chance, you should. It’s a beautiful place.” Yuuri smiled, standing closer to Viktor than he meant to. So far he was the only source of protection Yuuri had, he couldn’t help that his body demanded he go to him for comfort.

Spencer nodded, his hands busy typing away on the loud keyboard. “Right, okay, let’s see your ID and I can get that scanned in so we can get the process started. I have a stack of paperwork I’ll grab in a second for you to work on while I get a copy of it.”

The moment of truth. A lump formed in Yuuri’s throat as the reality of the situation seeped in deeper, past the happy thoughts he had put up as a shield. Could he really do this? Could he let this man he just met know his secret? He had to. Yuuri had to because he didn’t want to rely on others so much.

And yet, he still looked to Viktor, hoping the alpha had some sort of way to get him out of it.

“Spencer, the reason I wanted to come back here with Yuuri is because we both wanted to talk to you about something.” Viktor held his hand out in front of Yuuri, not in an expectant way, but like he had done before when he was offering it if Yuuri needed something to hold onto. “Yuuri is an omega and wants to keep that as much of a secret as possible. I asked you this favor because I have faith that you’ll be someone he can trust to keep his secret safe.”

Confusion filled Spencer’s expression, though it wouldn’t take someone long to figure out why an omega might want to hide who they were. If they weren’t being pampered, they were being looked down on.

“Of course, Viktor. I don’t mind that. I’ll only put it on the paperwork where I have to.” The beta smiled at Yuuri, still clearly confused but not asking any questions, much to Yuuri’s relief.

“Thank you,” Yuuri breathed out. He hadn’t realized he was holding his breath. “I-I’m sorry if it’s a hassle, I just- It’s best this way.” His ID doesn’t feel like as much of a death sentence as he hands it over to be scanned.

Spencer waved his hand at Yuuri. “I ain’t judging or anything, no need to apologize. Life is hard, I get that.” He digs out a small stack of papers from the filing cabinet, placing them and a pen on the desk in front of Yuuri. “Just sign where it asks you to and we can get you started within the week.”

Yuuri nodded excitedly, gripping the pen and looking to Viktor again, seeing that the other had let his hand fall back to his side. “Uh, thank you. You-”

“No need for all of that, Yuuri,” the alpha smiled. “I appreciate the thanks, but I know you’re grateful and don’t expect you to say it. I’m just happy I could help.” Viktor gestured to the papers. “When we’re done here, I’ll walk you home, okay?”

“Okay. Th-” He stopped himself, chuckling then brushing it off so that he could fill out what he needed to. Most of the questions were very simple and took only seconds to write in. Most of it was giving his address, number, and things like that. When he was done, he set the pen parallel to the papers and stood up straight, stretching out his hands. He almost told Viktor that he didn’t have to worry about walking him home, but he knew all too well by then that the alpha would insist and do it anyway.

But that was alright. Even though Yuuri didn’t want to rely on anyone, having someone with him that could protect him would make the walk much less stressful. The chances of anything actually happening were slim to none anyway, so it wasn’t like he was using Viktor like a shield.

Spencer came back with his ID, just as cheerful about everything as he had been when he left. “I’ve got your number now so I’ll give you a call in the next couple of days to let you know your start day and anything else you need to know.”

“Thank you so much, sir, I really appreciate the opportunity.” Yuuri gave his best smile, trying to focus on the nice feeling of getting a job so easily. All the bad thoughts could wait to bother him while he celebrated this victory.

“Of course, I look forward to working with you.”

They said their goodbyes then left, Viktor humming a jaunty tune while they walked towards his apartment.

Yuuri tried his best to keep his eyes on his feet again, taking each step carefully to avoid falling. His mind, however, refused to stay focused on them for long when Viktor was right there, peacefully walking him home.

“Hey, I, uh…” Yuuri cleared his throat, standing up straighter. “I-I know you said not to say thanks, but you’ve been so nice and I’d feel bad for not saying it. You’re really helping me out here and if there’s something I can do to thank you, please tell me.”

Viktor laughed, his humming coming to a stop. “Yuuri, all I want in return is for you to have a good time, honestly. I know most people don’t do nice things without wanting something in return, but I don’t know what I could possibly want other than that.”

“But why is that the case?” His question came out a little more whiny than he meant it to, but he doesn’t look away from Viktor. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to look a gift horse in the mouth, it’s just…”

“Weird? I know.” Viktor pauses and Yuuri realizes they’re already at his building. “I was always taught to look after people and when I presented as an alpha it came even more naturally. We’re meant to help people and protect, that’s our part in society.” He sighed, looking down the street. “I know not all of us do that, but I try to make up for that. I can tell an alpha is the one that hurt you, so part of why I’m doing this is to help you feel safer. Trusting blindly isn’t safe, but feeling scared of every alpha isn’t easy to live with either.”

Yuuri looked back at his feet. “You… You’re doing a good job helping me get there,” he said softly. “I don’t- It won’t be simple getting there, but you’re making it easier than if I were doing it on my own. Thank you, Viktor. I mean it.”

The alpha smiled again. “Of course, Yuuri. Do you need anything before I go? I can order some food or something to celebrate.”

“Oh, no, thank you. I ate before I came here and won’t be hungry again for a while. And besides, once I get settled at this job I think it’ll be my turn to buy us food.” Yuuri took a step closer to the building, still smiling with his cheeks tinted pink. “I’ll be sure to text you soon, though. Maybe… Maybe we can skate together soon to celebrate.”

“That sounds like a wonderful plan to me.” Viktor’s bright grin warmed Yuuri even when the alpha turned away, walking casually in the opposite direction.

His emotions had been a rollercoaster that day, however, they weren’t nearly as bad with Viktor there. The alpha had a way of keeping him calm and even though Yuuri wasn’t sure he could ever think of him as more than a friend, he knew that they would be very close friends, ones that looked after each other. Not that he could offer an alpha much, but he’d find some way to make this all up to Viktor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay Yuuri! You're doing so well, we're all proud ;w;
> 
> Comments and kudos are very appreciated! <3 <3 <3


	9. Comfortable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fell behind on my writing again oops ;w;
> 
> That's okay though because here's this now! :D
> 
> Follow me on other social media for updates and whatnot, I use the same username everywhere ^-^
> 
> Enjoy!~

Just as Yuuri had suspected, working at the convenience store was slow. For the first week, he mostly learned to stock shelves and help clean up, hanging on every word Sophie said to him whether it was about her day or work. He hadn’t realized how much he missed having a friend until he was laughing and working with one and texting another.

Viktor checked in on him every day, asking him if he needed anything and how he was doing. Yuuri always said that he had everything under control and was fine because, for the first time in a long time, he actually was. In the mornings he woke up and could get right out of bed to shower and make himself a nice breakfast, his body feeling refreshed and way less groggy than it had the week before.

The pep in his step made walking to work a pleasant part of his day where each day he held his head a little higher and even smiled and waved at a stranger passing by. And nothing bad came from it. He said hello to a total stranger who looked to be an alpha and his body didn’t immediately flinch away. That day he wore a huge smile on his face and struck up a conversation with every customer that came through.

“You know, Yuuri, most people that work this sort of job don’t smile nearly as much as you,” Sophie laughed, sitting up on the counter. They were just about to close and she had already swept the linoleum flooring and organized the magazine wrack so she had time to sit and watch Yuuri finish wiping the glass doors on the fridges.

“I’m just happy to have it.” Yuuri paused his work and looked over at Sophie. She had been let in on his secret since they ended up spending a lot of time together and he had grown used to the colorful way she dressed and put her dark blonde hair into pigtails most days. Some people gave her odd looks but Yuuri found her charm to be endearing. “I’m sure Viktor probably told you guys how much I was struggling to fit in here before this.”

Sophie hummed, tapping her finger on her chin. “No, I don’t think he said anything about that. All I remember him saying was that he had a good friend that would really appreciate a job here. He talked to Spencer a little more than me, but I don’t think anything about that was said.”

Yuuri looked at the rag in his hand, slowly getting back into cleaning the glass. Viktor didn’t seem like he was capable of talking down about anyone, or at least about Yuuri. To think, someone as put-together as him would see someone like Yuuri, an omega faking his secondary gender that lived a sad life in his apartment with no goals or way to get a job, and still think highly of him.

“He’s a nice guy,” Yuuri said, giving the door one last swipe of the rag before stepping back. “I think it’s about time we lock up. I’ll do the coffee station fill-up in the morning.”

“Tomorrow is your day off, silly.” Sophie hopped off the counter and walked over to Yuuri to take the rag out of his hand. “And you deserve a day off. This place has never been cleaner and you’ve only had one day off so far this week. I think everyone needs at least two in order to stay functioning.” She tossed the rag behind the counter and took off the name tag pinned to the front of her tucked in tie-dye T-shirt. It already clung to her body like it was a size too small, but she always liked to tuck her shirts during work hours like Yuuri. “You should take the day to do something for yourself. Do a bubble bath, or find your favorite movie and eat junk food while watching it.”

A laugh came from Yuuri as he took his own name tag off. His clothes were way tamer than hers, simple button-up shirts with the sleeves rolled up and slacks to tuck the shirts into. Some people probably thought he was overdressed for the job. And he kind of was, however, he liked to make sure he looked professional so that fewer people questioned things he said.

“Right, I forgot about that. I’ll make sure to do something nice for myself, promise.” Yuuri looked over the store one more time then dug his phone from his pocket to check the time. Nine on the dot. “Alright, I’m going to head out, since you have the keys to lock up. I’ll see you the day after tomorrow.”

“Wait, Yuuri,” Sophie whined, “You should let me give you a ride home. It’s not like you live far and I don’t mind.”

Yuuri shook his head. “No, I’m alright. As you said, I don’t live far, and the exercise is good for me. Aside from work, it’s the only movement I do.”

Sophie tilted her head, placing a hand on her hip. “I thought you skated with Viktor and his crew. Did something happen with that?”

Something did  _ kind _ of happen and that something was Yuuri’s fear of being around others. But that has been disappearing lately, right? He could get back into it. Viktor would be thrilled to hear about it. Maybe he would text him that night and ask to do some skating the next day as his treat to himself. Being apart from one of his favorite hobbies had been a bit rough, after all.

“Uh, no, I just haven’t been doing it lately. I got into a bit of a slump then I got this job so I didn’t think to fit it in my schedule. But I think I might go tomorrow.” Yuuri tucked his phone back into his pocket and looked out the front windows. The sun had set and the streetlamps were on, dimly lighting his path home. “I’ll text you later, I want to make food before it gets too late.”

“Alright, well, have fun!”

Yuuri waved back at Sophie as he left, his stride confident for how dark it had gotten. Hardly anyone ever walked that street aside from him and an older lady that liked to walk her golden lab in the mornings and sometimes at night. The time alone gave Yuuri a moment to breathe in the night air and get his mind off of work. His job was fine and not even remotely stressful, but having it on the mind all the time would wear him down so he opted to think instead about skating.

Viktor seemed so excited to get him into the sport. Was it because it would allow them to spend more time with each other? Or did he actually see some potential in Yuuri? The answer could only be found through time, he supposed. And it wasn’t like it really mattered, anyway. In the end, Yuuri wanted to skate for himself, for fun. Having a job and seeing that he can live peacefully in a new, exciting place had given him the confidence to realize that.

At home, Yuuri made himself a quick dinner so that he could shower and get into bed early, giving him plenty of time to sleep for the next day. He wanted to have as much energy as possible so that he could skate for longer than he normally would and see what he could do out on the ice. Maybe if he felt confident enough, he could take up the invitation to work with Viktor, even if it was just to help him get better at it for his own sake. The hobby itself is fun and would be more so if he could get into it, so he hoped for the best as he tucked himself in for the night, setting a later alarm so that he could sleep in but still be up early enough to have time at the rink.

Yuuri wakes up with the said alarm, stretching out and yawning as he climbs out of bed to meander into the kitchen and make himself something quick, as well as a small pot of coffee to wake him up a little more. Usually, he never drank much of that stuff but it had become a bit of a habit while working.

After his breakfast of eggs and toast, washed down with his heavily sweetened coffee, Yuuri dug around in his closet for an outfit that would be fit for skating. He settled on a black long-sleeved shirt and some athletic sweats that fit him perfectly. The shirt was a bit big, but he never minded having a little room to breathe in his clothes.

The air outside filled his lungs with a pleasant warmth that he hadn’t been expecting. Outside usually meant constricted breathing, fast-paced walking, and looking over his shoulder at least once or twice. Instead, Yuuri walks to the rink with his head held high. He looks more like an alpha than he ever did before, strutting like he owned the place.

It seemed the man at the front desk noticed the difference as well, actually looking up at Yuuri and raising a brow before gesturing to the machine to pay.

“Never forget a face, do you?” Yuuri laughed.

“Not once,” the man hummed, looking back down at his phone.

Yuuri pushed the door open and took in a deep breath, taking in the chilled air of the rink. The frost in it nips at his lips and lungs, fully waking up every part of his body and energizing him from head to toe. It had been too long since he got this feeling from a rink.

“Yuuri, you’re here!” Viktor’s voice called from across the ice. “How wonderful, I’ve been hoping you would come around!”

Yuuri waved at him and the others, not missing how everyone else looked like they already had enough of him.

“Today’s my day off, I figured it would be nice to get some time on the ice.” He walked over to one of the benches, setting his bag down and sitting next to it while Viktor hurried over to him.

“That’s great because I have a surprise for you!” The alpha put his finger up in Yuuri’s face, less than an inch from his nose. “Close your eyes and wait right here!”

Yuuri blinked at the finger then gave a small nod, closing his eyes and waiting with stiff shoulders. His good mood allowed him to sit still for a minute, but soon the creeping sense of dread started to make his thoughts wander. Sitting with his eyes closed wasn’t ideal and the longer he waited there, the more he wished Viktor would hurry it up. As nice as a surprise was, he didn’t want to be in a place where he didn’t have his back against the wall and couldn’t see.

“Okay, I know you weren’t a big fan of the idea at first, but I went ahead and got them for you anyway. Open your eyes!” Viktor was suddenly sitting in front of him, holding something against Yuuri’s chest.

When he opened his eyes and looked down to see a brand new pair of skates, Yuuri was left opening and closing his mouth, unable to form a sentence.

New skates? But the alpha hadn’t even been sure that Yuuri would ever come back there. Did he buy them in the hopes that he would, or would he have given them to him anyway to try and egg him into coming back? Yuuri didn’t know either way and he kind of didn’t care. New skates hadn’t been something he could’ve afforded for a while, and the ones Viktor was giving him looked like they were some of the priciest ones money could buy.

“W-wow, Viktor… I don’t know if I can accept these.” Yuuri held them up to look at better, confirming that they were, in fact, very nicely made. “You’ve already done so much for me, I don’t feel right accepting such an expensive gift.”

“Nonsense, Yuuri!” Viktor leaned in closer, putting one of his hands over Yuuri’s. “I know you’re trying to get back on your feet, and I really want to keep helping. If you want to skate again, and you being here says that you do, then you’re going to need better equipment. Yours look like one more fall could tear them apart, and that’s dangerous. I don’t want you to get hurt on the ice. Or at all, really, but the ice will hurt a lot.”

Yuuri laughed, looking down at the skates again. Could he accept them? Could he find enough time to break them in? “I… Thank you, Viktor.” Accepting them was pretty much his only option because he knew all too well by then that trying to deny the alpha’s help was only going to lead to Viktor insisting. And it  _ was _ quite nice to finally have some assurance that he wasn’t going to break an ankle because of bad skates.

“Of course! I had Sophie do some investigating and she told me your shoe size, so I’m very confident that I picked ones that will work out well for you. If not, let me know and we’ll go together to get ones that do.” Viktor hopped up from the bench, motioning to the others. “I need to spend most of my time with them today, but that’ll be fine because I’d like you to enjoy the ice and get used to them on your own terms.”

Yuuri gave a firm nod, already excited to try on the skates. As soon as Viktor sauntered away, he was taking off his normal shoes and pushing his feet into them. As he thought they would be, they were a bit stiff and a little uncomfortable. They did fit, however, he knew it would be a little while before they felt like something he could frequently use on the ice.

Still, despite the discomfort, Yuuri got them tied up and wobbled his way to the rink, holding onto the side while he picked some music to listen to. Ever the sucker for something classical, Yuuri put on a nice piano ballad and pushed away from the wall.

He once again filled his lungs with a gulp of the frosty air, his feet gliding under him as he did. The skates effortlessly carried him over the ice as if he was floating, a crisp sound coming from their new blades. Yuuri pushed himself further to the middle of his side of the rink, pausing to ground himself then moving his right leg forward to begin his simple routine.

All it ever consisted of was him quickly bounding around, keeping in time with the music loudly playing in his headphones. But something about it, something that he hadn’t been able to feel in so many years, felt different that time. Even though he couldn’t do any jumps, fancy spins, or complex movements with his arms or legs, Yuuri had  _ fun _ circling the rink. He could close his eyes and let his feet carve a path for him, swaying from side to side just enough to make it feel as though he was dancing.

As the music played and his legs worked, Yuuri’s mind allowed him to escape, the room around him no longer having any weight to it. All he knew was the ice, the way it kept him cool even in his warm outfit, and the music pulling him along.

When the piano swelled and a violin joined the tune, Yuuri spun around carefully, his new skates allowing him to turn on a dime without tripping over himself. Skating was definitely for him. Nothing could replace the feeling of gliding so effortlessly to music the way he had that day, and even when the song began to fade to make room for the next one, Yuuri couldn’t wipe the smile from his face.

From then on, his days off would be for skating. Whether he would pursue it professionally or not would still be up in the air for the time being, but there was no leaving this feeling now that he had it back again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More of Yuuri feeling great because depression is evil and likes to give people time to feel happy before it strikes again lol
> 
> Anyway, comments are much appreciated! <3


	10. Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see ;w; Thank you all for your patience! <3
> 
> Long story short, I got evicted (on my birthday, no less, it was a bad time 🙃) and had to move, then I had major surgery (It went well, don't worry! I'm all healed up now ^-^) and then the holidays happened. So life has been SUPER hectic for me, to say the least. But that's pretty much the constant for me, so who knows when or if the crazy will ever stop/slow down :p
> 
> ANYWAY, here's the new chapter, next one will come with content warnings and angst, so be prepared for that. If you'd like to see updates on how writing is going, I'm active on Tumblr, Twitter, and Insta under the same username. Twitter is Robospacecase because their stupid limit but c'est la vie.
> 
> Enjoy!~

Work became a second home faster than Yuuri expected it to. Sophie and Spencer constantly checked in and made sure that he felt comfortable with the position he was working. Yuuri always insisted that he was fine, though there were a few times they moved him away from the register anyway if there happened to be a large alpha or a couple of alphas in the store. He never told them why alphas were an issue for him, but they seemed to catch on pretty quickly and always kept an eye out for him.

At nights, Spencer would sometimes come around and offer to take them both out for dinner and drinks, though Yuuri always declined. He liked to go home and decompress and recharge the social battery that often ran low or empty by the end of a workday. Even good friends like them could drain it and that mixed with the physical work left him wanting his couch or bed every day.

After a full day of staring at the unexciting colors in the convenience store —any vibrance they might have dulled by the fluorescent lights— he also liked to have some time to look at something interesting for a change. He had never been one to sit and watch TV before, but American shows were pretty interesting, and catching up on movies that he had missed over the years offered a lot of mindless, relaxing nights.

On his days off, Yuuri was always at the rink, talking a little bit with Viktor then skating for about an hour before he exhausted himself and had to stop. His skills were improving, little by little. Sometimes, when a song playing had a spot that seemed like a jump would go well with it, Yuuri would test his skills and do a little hop, rarely ever messing it up. At one point, he even found himself skating backward for a minute, copying some of the movements Yuri and Christophe were doing across from him.

Viktor always commented on how well he was doing, though Yuuri noticed that he never pushed his offer again to help Yuuri do more with it. Maybe the alpha thought he was giving up on the idea entirely, or maybe he was silently revoking the offer.

Either way, Yuuri was alright with that. He really enjoyed feeling unpressured on the ice, just gliding and not thinking about, well, anything. Not work, not bills, not his anxiety, not a single thing that would upset him could bother him out there. It had once again become the place that he could escape to, the place that he could truly let go and have all the time in the world to just breathe.

“Spencer asked me if I’d like to go out for drinks tonight, I was thinking we could all go. You know, like a big group event. I think it would be fun!” Viktor plopped down on the bench next to Yuuri, his scent stronger than normal thanks to the sweat from skating.

Yuuri had barely got his skates off from a long session, wiping his forehead with the long sleeve of his shirt. “Oh, I-I don’t know… I really need a shower. I think… I mean, I don’t want my scent to become a problem.” Even though he could only smell his fake alpha scent, Yuuri would always worry about someone catching a hint of what was hidden underneath.

Viktor leaned the tiniest bit closer, his eyes closing a little as he inhaled through his nose. Silence followed the action, sticking around for a second too long. It was hard to tell, but Yuuri could swear that the alpha’s pupils dilated a little during that silence. “I think you smell wonderful. But it’s up to you if you want to come or not. I understand large gatherings can be a lot.”

“I…” Yuuri didn’t really have a problem with being in a group, and he wasn’t all that tired despite skating for most of the day. He gulped, clenching his jaw. Why couldn’t he just say yes and go? What was holding him back? Maybe it was the way Viktor looked at him, those hopeful eyes wanting to spend time with him outside of the routine Yuuri had grown so used to. The way he was looking at Yuuri and with how much he had been checking in on him, it was starting to seem as though the alpha was really trying to make a move.

“Yuuri, it’s fine if you don’t want to, I don’t mean to pressure you.” Viktor’s voice was soft as always, but he didn’t move back after saying that he wasn’t pressuring him. The alpha stayed right where he was, looking as though something had started to eat at him more and more.

There were a few more beats of silence before Yuuri cleared his throat, leaning back a little away from him. “Uh, I-I think I’ll just head home for tonight. I have… I have some cleaning I need to do anyway. Laundry and stuff like that.”

Viktor hummed, finally moving back once Yuuri had broken their eye contact. “Of course, of course. Sorry, I- I should get some things done today as well.” He stood, shaking his head and lightly smacking himself on the cheek a few times. “I’ll see you again soon, Yuuri!” The alpha took his leave, walking briskly away as if he were suddenly on a mission.

Yuuri blinked at the ground for a moment before shrugging the encounter off and standing up as well. Viktor was always a little odd, but that encounter seemed even weirder than usual. So much so that Yuuri hesitated to leave, tapping his foot and biting his lip. Viktor had done a lot for him, wouldn’t it be fair for him to check up on the alpha for once? There could be something wrong and while Yuuri didn’t know how to help, he could at least offer to be there to talk to.

His feet moved before he could second guess the idea, taking him along the same path Viktor took to the locker room. The others were in there as well, all of them staring at Yuuri when he marched in as if he had some grand purpose to fulfill. His confidence deflated in less than a second when he noticed them. Yuuri hadn’t meant to look as though he was ready to do something bold, but the others probably thought he was about to thanks to that entrance.

“U-um, Viktor?”

The alpha is already looking at him, confused and leaning on a locker. “Yes, Yuuri? Did you change your mind about tonight?”

“Ah, no, that’s… That’s not it. I just…” He sucked in a deep breath, ignoring how much the room smelled of the other alphas and the beta. “I just wanted to say that if there’s ever anything wrong, you can count on me too, okay? You’ve helped me a lot, and if you ever need me to help you, I’ll be there. I may not… I may not have a lot to offer, but I can do my best.”

Viktor’s soft smile helped melt away the odd looks the others were giving him, but before the alpha could respond, Yuri scoffed loudly.

“Get a grip, you mushy bastard. Don’t get all lovely in front of us, we don’t want to see it!” The smaller alpha puffed up, acting big in front of his beta. “If you two want to talk, go somewhere else to be gross with each other.”

“You’re one to talk, Yuri,” Christophe snorted. “I’ve seen you and Beka be all sorts of romantic in front of us.” The third alpha started to make kissy faces at Yuri, dodging the towel that the younger threw at his face.

Even though his stride had been broken, Yuuri kept his face on Viktor, hoping that the alpha knew he had been telling the truth. The alpha stared right back at him, still smiling and looking as though he had plenty to say about it.

“How about I walk you home, Yuuri? We can talk on the way.” Viktor picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder then started to walk to the door, Yuuri following behind to get away from the other alphas. “Sorry about them, they’re a lot to deal with, I know. But they’re good at what they do, so I tolerate it.”

Yuuri laughed, trying his best not to seem too nervous about what Viktor might want to say in response to his declaration in the locker room. “They’re fine, a bit loud, but nothing I can’t handle.”

The alpha nodded and stayed silent until they were out of the rink. He took in a deep breath, enjoying the fresh air. “I’m sorry that I made it seem like something is wrong,” he started once they were walking again. “Nothing is really wrong, I just had an… Unexpected thing come up.”

“Unexpected thing?” Yuuri tilted his head, looking at Viktor as much as he could while still keeping his feet from tripping while they walked. “Do you want to talk about it? I-I think talking is about as much as I can offer to help, I’m kind of useless in every other aspect.”

“You’re not worthless in any aspect, Yuuri.” The alpha ran a hand through his silver hair, keeping it on the top of his head. “It’s actually kind of silly to me because this sort of thing never happens, but I didn’t know how it would make you feel so I didn’t say anything. But, that was foolish of me and now I know it’s something I would have had to mention anyway.”

Yuuri had been prepared to hear something about a sudden trip for work, or for the alpha to go on about forgetting some sort of event. But when the word “rut” came from him, he froze, his feet cementing themselves to the sidewalk.

“Your rut is coming up?” How was it supposed to make him feel? Viktor would be spending it away from him, in his own home. And yet fear gripped Yuuri’s heart because alphas, especially unmated ones, were  _ violent _ during ruts. He couldn’t even picture Viktor being in a rut, growling and clawing at things. All he could see when he thought about that was the alpha trying to seduce him and that just made his entire face turn red.

“I knew it wouldn’t be a good subject for you, Yuuri, it’s why I wasn’t going to say anything. But you would end up questioning why I wasn’t answering texts for a couple of days or showing up at the rink.” Viktor let his hand fall from the top of his head, holding it out for Yuuri to take. “I appreciate what you said earlier, I really do. But, of course, this isn’t something you can help me with, so I should walk you home and then see you  _ after _ my rut passes.”

There was no doubt in his mind that he was safe with Viktor. No doubt whatsoever that the alpha would keep him out of harm’s way and not do anything to make him feel uncomfortable. But knowing that he stood next to an alpha about to be in a rut…

“It’s okay, Yuuri.”

That soft voice always managed to cut through the bad thoughts. Viktor was an alpha near a rut, yes, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t still  _ Viktor. _ The alpha keeping his secret, the one that had helped him so much. And the one looking at him, wanting so badly to be accepted as that. Yuuri  _ could  _ be of help to him, and that help came in the form of showing that he trusted Viktor.

Yuuri took the offered hand firmly, the panic seeping from his features as if it hadn’t been there in the first place. “I know it is. I’ll miss our texts while you’re away.”

For the first time ever, Viktor’s face flooded with emotion. Alphas or omegas near a rut or heat often craved validation and would take any rejection to heart, so there was no doubt in Yuuri’s mind that he had just comforted Viktor’s inner alpha. He looked so content, so pleased and assured in himself that it made Yuuri smile.

“I’ll be sure to send you some the moment I’m no longer sweaty and angry!” the alpha cheered, practically skipping with Yuuri as they continued to make their way to his apartment, still holding hands.

Compliments went far with a person who was about to go into a heat or a rut, so it was no surprise to Yuuri that Viktor started to talk happily during their walk, going on and on about how his day had been and how excited he was to skate again with Yuuri after his rut. He kept going until they reached Yuuri’s building, stopping mid-sentence and laughing.

“Oh, I just talked your ear off, sorry! I didn’t mean to. But I’m glad that we got to talk like this before I have to lock myself away. And I’m also delighted that I was able to introduce you to Spencer and Sophie before it because I know they’ll be happy to help you while I’m stuck at home.” Viktor looked down at their hands, his smile melting into a softer version of itself. “Don’t be afraid to text me during it, it’ll be nice to read your messages after.”

Yuuri nodded, his eyes also going down to their hands. Viktor had a warmth to him that he wanted to hold onto forever, one that, for once, didn’t remind him of pain. The heat of an alpha had become something he thought he would hate for the rest of his life, but Viktor’s hand, the way it held his so perfectly…

“I’ll see you in a few days, Yuuri.” Viktor’s gaze had gone back to Yuuri’s face. “Have fun at work tomorrow, and say hi to Sophie for me.”

“I will. B-bye, Viktor.” Having to let go of the alpha’s hand when his body so badly wanted to join him left Yuuri in a daze, the world spinning as the alpha said his goodbye and walked the other way. Viktor’s on-coming rut must have gotten to his head because his inner omega was screaming at him to run after the alpha, to let himself be claimed and held by all that warmth and pleasant smell.

He had to shake his head and march up to his apartment to snap himself out of it. Viktor was just a good friend. One that was interested in him, yes, but he had said that he was alright with just being friends. That’s all they were, good friends that looked out for each other. Good friends that held hands and smiled while they did it.

The click of his apartment door brought Yuuri back into reality just long enough for him to take in a large gulp of air. Filling his lungs grounded him, at least for a moment. The second he started the mindless task of showering, his thoughts went right back to Viktor and what the other must’ve been thinking about. Did he want Yuuri to spend his rut with him? He probably did, and thinking about being wanted by an alpha like that had his cheeks burning.

Yuuri turned the knob for the cold water higher, dousing those thoughts. No way was he ready for getting into a relationship with an alpha. Viktor had been nothing but super nice to him, but…

Thinking about it all was too much. Yuuri finished cleaning himself then went right to his bed, curling up under all the blankets. Being away from the alpha should help get the feelings to go away. Surely work would be enough of a distraction to keep him from dwelling on them for too long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Viktor will be out of the picture for a few days, I sure do hope Yuuri won't need him during that time uwu
> 
> Comments and kudos are my lifeblood for writing fics, so if you feel so inclined, I would love to hear your thoughts! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Comments quench my thirst for attention so drown me in them and I will return the favor by satisfying your thirst for the Gay™ lmao  
> <3 <3 <3


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